"QUEER AS FOLK" and other related entities are owned, (TM) and © by COWLIP PRODUCTIONS, SJ2 ENTERTAINMENT, TONY JONES PRODUCTIONS, QAF III PRODUCTIONS, DUFFERIN GATE PRODUCTIONS, INC and CELEBRITY PUBLIC RELATIONS in association with SHOWTOME NETWORKS, INC. All Rights Reserved. This transcript is posted here without their permission, approval, authorization or endorsement. Any reproduction, duplication, distribution or display of this material in any form or by any means is expressly prohibited. It is absolutely forbidden to use it for commercial gain. For Entertainment and Educational purposes only. No infringement intended.
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TRANSCRIPT:
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[Babylon. A crowded dancefloor.
In the middle we see Brian who gets sucked by a trick.
Nobody seems to care.]
[Michael with the laundry. A old
geezer cruising on him. After the end of the program
Michael bend over, thinks of it and turns around that the
old man cannot watch his butt. After that in Michaels
flat.]
Michael: I lost a sock and a pair of shorts but I will
not get down to the kripmaster. Ben?
[Ben siting at the couch and reading.]
Ben: Uh, yeah?
Michael: I've said there was this guy down... [no answer]
This incredible hot guy and I was bending over to my
laundry after the dryer. And he ripped off my pants and
fucked the shit out of me.
Ben: Uh huh.
[Michael goes to the couch and throws on his lap.]
Ben: Hey, what are you doin'?
Michael: I'm reading the newspaper and... oh, the house
market?
Ben: Yeah, I'm looking for an apartment, Michael.
Michael: You already have an apartment. Complete with
compliences and floors and a built new boyfriend.
Ben: I think it is the best with my own place.
Michael: Yeah, but I think it is the best that you stay.
[He kisses him.]
Ben: Are you sure you wouldn't be here rather with Brian?
[Michael thinks of it - cut to Brian, who's getting a
blowjob in Babylon. And cut back to Michael]
Michael: Well, I have to admit, it is tempting... but
then I would miss out on all this pre-succing, spin-dry
and not to mention having the hottest man in Pittsburgh
they have my fluffing.
[With that Michael drags Ben to lying at the Couch, he
took his glasses off.]
[Cut to the loft, the next day.
Lindsay and Gus are there.]
Brian: "Happy Carneval"? Are you out of your
fucking mind?
Lindsay: I like to think not.
Brian: After the way they screw me don't you think I help
the center to selfdistruct.
Lindsay: Well that's exactly what might happen when we
don't boosed our cooperated sponsorship and raise a
hundred thousand.
Brian: That's not my problem.
[A naked trick is walking around the loft. Lindsay hems
and hold her hand to Gus eyes.]
Lindsay: Anything else here here that I should about?
Brian: Hopefully not before I do.
Lindsay: Look, it may be not your problem - but it is a
very big problem for a lot of members of our community
and the AIDS hospiz and homless teeny shelter. All I'm
asking is for you volunteer a few hours of your time to
help organized this fundraiser. Maybe call a few of our
clients and see if they're willing to tribute.
Brian: I don't do volenteer work.
Lindsay: Oh thanks a lot Brian. I'll hope I didn't keep
for from attending more important things.
[Lindsay looks in the bedroom and see the tricks reading.
But Brian looks at the computer to a car website.]
Brian: However, the center had to come more... minimal
agree?
[Lindsay presents Brians
proposal to the GLC.]
Philip: There is no way we're working with him.
Tannis: It's out of question.
Lindsay: I understand your reluctance to get involved.
However, if he's willing to put himself - I said we
should do the same.
Tannis: Just what exactly is Mr.Kinney offering to do?
Lindsay: Organized the event, bringing co-operate
sponsorship...
Philip: I said we're doin' fine without him.
Lindsay: If you call selling 40 tickets doin' fine.
Brian's put together a proposing to give the carneval a
big new event. He also contact a few of his clients. And
they agree to sponsor the event and match any funds we
raise up to 100.000 dollars.
[Both look at each other and smiles.]
Tannis: Please extend to Mr.Kinney, the center is grated
to devore of volunteer his time and efford.
Lindsay: Well, he's not exactly volunteering. He wants
20% of the top.
Philip: He expects us to pay him? For fundraising?
Tannis: Is he kidding?
Lindsay: His feeling is "would he have rather 100%
of nothing or 80% of more than you ever fucking dreamed
of"?
[So Brian gets his new car - or
his new old car - its a classic.]
Brian: So, what do you think? Can I buy it?
Michael: $30,000 is a lot of money for an old car.
Brian: It's not old - it's a classic.
Michael: It's a high plan for paying it.
Brian: Unless you cash.
Michael: That's a seizable juck of change for a boyfriend
replacement therapy.
Brian: I dont have a boyfriend. Ive never had
a boyfriend.
Michael: Right. Then it must be a midlife crisis.
Brian: I'm only thirty...
Michael: One.
Brian: And since I'm planning of being death by the time
of thirty-nine that's my way to do it.
Michael: Yeah, I'll be sure to remind you by the time on
your 60.birthday.
Brian: C'mon, Mikey, relief now and be home by midnight.
Michael: No fucking way! Ben nearly move out because of
you.
[Michael gets out of the car. Brian drives away.]
[At the diner. Carl eats sweets
and Debbie watches him.]
Carl: Is that look for longing for me or for the cream?
Debbie: Wouldn't you like to know?
Carl: Want the last bite?
Debbie: Hell no. I have actually a waist. Or haven't you
noticed?
Carl: Oh, I've noticed.
Debbie: And...?
Carl: And it's looking good. Real good. [he leans forward
and kisses her.]
Man: C'mon, Deb!
Debbie: Um, orders up.
Carl: I'll see you friday?
Debbie: Yeah, I'll serve a lane...
Carl: What do you say we skip the bowling this week -
maybe have a litte dinner?
Debbie: Friday is a three grams of fish in four pounched
of steam keal.
Carl: Hmm, my favourite. Afterwards we could watch tv.
Debbie: Yeah, well the...the... sec downstairs are in the
frits. The only one who's working is the one in my
bedroom.
Carl: I know.
[Both laughing. Debbie gets the orders and serves to
Emmett and Ted.]
Ted: So, Deb, what's it like doin' with a cop?
Emmett: Does he connect to strip search?
Ted: Hank-off over the bed?
Emmett: Or curious things...?
Debbie: Do you know what MYOB stands for? Mind your own
fucking business.
[she goes away.]
Ted: Should there be an F in there?
Emmett: Hmmm.
[Brian comes in. He goes over to Justin, who's cleaning
some desk.]
Brian: I have a proposition. [Justin gives him a look.] A
business proposition.
Justin: Whatd you have in mind?
Brian: A poster. Something hot and brilliant. And
something by tomorrow.
(Justin gives him a dubious look)
Brian: I wouldnt ask you if I didnt think you
could do it.
Justin: And if you werent desperate.
Brian: Yeah, that too.
Justin: Whats it for?
Brian: It's for the Center carnival.
Justin: (laughing) You fucking hate the Center!
Brian: Not when theyre paying me. So how much do
you want?
Justin: Its for a good cause, so its free.
Brian: Christ, didnt I teach you anything?
Justin: $500.
Brian: $200.
Justin: $500, take it or leave it.
Brian: I like the way you do business.
[Mel and Lindsay's home.]
Lindsay: [speechless] You had the procedure?
Mel: Like you've said that was no big deal. He did it in
the office, zapp me with the laser a couple of ditches...
Lindsay: You should have told me, I'd have come.
Mel: I had something to do with my own... like bungee
jumping.
Lindsay: I hope that's not next.
Mel: I mean, face my fear, head on and hope I splat.
Lindsay: And did you land splat?
Mel: Everything is fine. He said I can get pregnant right
away.
Lindsay: Oh, Mel.
[Lindsay umbrace her.]
Mel: I guess you're
right - I was just using it as an excuse.
Lindsay: It doesn't matter.
Mel: It matters a lot because I want to be the one who
carry our next child.
Lindsay: Are you sure?
[Mel nods]
Lindsay: So we could a little Melanie?
Mel: Or Melvin.
Lindsay: By next christmas.
Mel: Now we have to do is the pick up a donate.
Lindsay: I thoughed we already had one.
Mel: There is no fucking way - Brian Kinney's fucking
sperma come into me.
Lindsay: I speak from experience.
Mel: Well, after all that grief he cost us? We are not
make the same mistake twice.
Lindsay: I understand exactly how your feel. But what if
something happen to us? A fatal accident...
Mel: Bungee jumping?
Lindsay: I am serious! At least our kids have the same
father.
Mel: Oh, some father - a selfish, promiscuous... who know
if he is negative?
Lindsay: Whoever it is he have to be tested. But think of
Gus - allways there to write a check, put up a swing set,
safe our wedding from desaster - honestly Mel, he's not
the old Brian, he's changed, bottom line. Without him our
kids wouldn't be related.
[The boys are doing sit-ups at
the gym.]
Ted: Who's the hottie?
Michael: My boyfriend.
Ted: The other hottie?
Emmett: Uh, looks like Tarzan.
Brian: Sounds like Jane. He use steroids as he can.
Emmett: Steroids?
Brian: Yeah, surprise there is no second asshole.
Debbie: Not to mention mood swings and his balls shrings.
[The boys - especiall Michael are shocked to see Debbie
here.]
Michael: Ma, what are you doin' here?!
Debbie: Same thing you are.
Brian: Cruising for a blowjob?
Debbie: Jesus Ma, you already go to the same bars, the
same clubs I do. Now you even come to the same gym!?
Can't I have one place in the world that is my own?
Debbie: So you want to be my workout buddies?
[Horrified Michael gets up and leaves. Ted, Emmett and
Debbie go on the treadmills together.]
Emmett: Looking good, girl!
Ted: Your privat dick things too.
Debbie: I told you I have no intention to turning the
most intimate tales of my personal life in gym gossip
like you, gay guys.
Ted: In other workd - you haven't done it yet.
Debbie: It doesn't because he is not interested. It's
just in a while since I worked out. I didn't want to
disappoint him.
Ted: Well, if anyone knows how to please your man - it's
Em.
Emmett: Hush. All you need is a little refresher course.
And who better instruct you than Professors Honeycutt and
Schmidt?
Ted: Doctors of dickology.
[In the locker room Michael goes carefully in - looks
everywhere.]
Michael: She's not in here, isn't she?
Ben: Who?
Michael: My mother.
Ben: It's the men's locker room.
Michael: You'll think that'll stop her?
Man#1: Full hour in the court and I'm look a pound.
Man#2: Hey Ben.
Ben: Hey, how's goin'?
Man#2: Good.
Man#1: Remember those 5 minutes in the 90s where everyone
want to put up weight because there meant to be dying? At
least we're not goin' to that goddamn hospice - talk
about depressing.
Ben: So, who's in there, Paul?
Man#1: Uh, didn't you hear? He died last night.
[Cut to Justin and Ethan. Justin
working at the computer.]
Ethan: [to the phone] Alright, Ill be there. Even
if it means incurring Ishiguras wrath for not
practicing my Bartok. I'll don't know, I ask him. [to
Justin] Hey Jus, my friend Callie wants to know if my
imaginary lover will be there?
Justin: Tell them Id rather eat shit and die.
Ethan: [to the phone] He says he'd can't wait to meet
you. Yeah, I'll talk to you later. [he hangs up] Now why
do you have to be so antisocial?
Justin: Im not antisocial. I just cant stand
people!
Ethan: C'mon, you have a great time.
Justin: Chatting and failing about abandoned film in a
room full of strangers?
Ethan: Oh my god you're a bigger fucking snop than I am.
That's why I love you. Whats this?
Justin: Its a poster Im working on for a
charity event.
Ethan: I wish somebody would throw a benefit for us.
Justin: Actually, Im getting paid.
Ethan: Like, as in dollars?
Justin: As in $500.
Ethan: No shit, how did you swing that?
Justin: Someone I know.
Ethan: (laughs) Oh, someone you know! Someone we both
know?
Justin: (defensively) He needed an artist.
Ethan: And even though he works with dozens of them every
day in his office, he miraculously thought of you.
Justin: Maybe he thought I was the best qualified for the
job.
Ethan: Or maybe hes just trying to win you back.
Justin: He can try all he wants. What makes you think I
would ever go?
Ethan: Oh, I dont know, hes rich, hes
gorgeous, he can make cash magically appear?
Justin: Fuck the money. Fuck him. I want to be with you.
Ethan: Prove it.
Justin: I'm not gonna prove it.
Ethan: C'mon.
Justin: How do I love the 'Let-me-count-the-ways'
Ethan: Oh, you can do better than that.
[With that he tosses Ethan at the bed and give him a
blowjob.]
[At the bar in Woodys.]
Mel: No, this ones is one me.
Brian: So, what do you want this time?
Lindsay: We've decided to give Gus a sipling.
Brian: And when we gonna do this? We have 2 hours.
Lindsay: Oh, not now!
Brian: Well, when did you want it?
Lindsay: I don't.
Mel: There a slight change of plans - I'm going to be the
one to carry out our next child.
Brian: [laughs] You!? I thoughed you can't have one.
Mel: I had intrometriosis.
Lindsay: But she's cured.
Brian: There is a lord.
Lindsay: So, what do you say?
Brian: It's impossible. Besides, I agreed to inseminate
you, not your husband.
Lindsay: But if you choose someelse our kid won't be
related.
Brian: Have you ever meet my sister? That's not much of
an argument.
Lindsay: But we had a deal!
Brian: You were the ones who changed the terms.
[Brian gets up and walks out.]
Mel: Id say that went well!
[Private coaching time with
Professor Honeycut and Professor Schmidt - and alot of
dildos.]
Debbie: Jesus Christ! Do you realised that people eat
here?
Emmett: There all fresh new.
Ted: And picked from the pleasure boutice.
Debbie: I just want to sleep with the guy not drill for
oil.
Emmett: Well that's why we brough these things to help
you arceive the goal. Which would you say most resembles
to Detective Horvath?
Debbie: How the hell would I know!? I've only kissed him.
Now put those things away.
Ted: Not so fast. Now, you ask for our help and that's
why we've come to teach you...
Emmett: The Art of Oral Sex.
Ted: We're gonna shared with you secrets only gay men
knows.
Emmett: Techniques passed down from generation to
generation since time in memorial.
Ted: Once you've passed the course we're guarantee
Horvath will forever guard you. Now, shall we begin?
Emmett: All right, let us relaxed the jaw, rotating first
cockwise, than counter cockwise, now wag the tongue.
Ted: Next grab the shaft firmly with your right hand and
creating a velvet wise.
Emmett: Now open wide, being sure to cover your teeth
allowed a smooth and unextracted entry.
Debbie: Boys you know I love you - but I need to ask you
one question. ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MINDS!??? There
is no way I'm gonna do this.
Ted: There are parties in Beverly Hills where housewife
pay thousand bucks a head...
Emmett: So a week.
Ted: To learn what we're teaching you for free.
Emmett: Debbie, you're gonna make Horvath happy, don't
you?
Debbie: Sure I do.
Ted: And do you have a good time yourself?
Emmett: So what's the harm to do it the right way?
[She spit out her gum, grab a small dildo, but the boys
shake their heads. She take the biggest dildo at the
table.]
[In front of the liberty diner.
Ben sitting on a bench, smoking. Michael comes from the
diner.]
Michael: Here, I have chili - you wanna get?
Ben: Thank you. I am allright.
Michael: I'm sorry.
Ben: For what?
Michael: For Paul. For you.
Ben: I didn't expect that so soon. If I'd known, I would
gonna see him more often.
Michael: You were busy.
Ben: Right. It's always an excuse not to visit someone
you'd shared for life with, your bed.
Michael: I'm sure he would understood. And forgave you
the same way you forgave him.
Ben: Why am I so goddamn angry at him right now? For
getting it, for giving it to me. For not even bothering
to take care of himself or watch what he ate. I would
tell him nutrition is essential. And exercise, you gotta
build up your muscle mass. But it was as if once he knew
he had it, he figured Im gonna die anyway so what
the hell difference does it make?
Michael: Luckily, youre not like that.
Ben: Riiiight!
Michael: You do everything youre supposed to do,
everything you could possibly do
Ben: And in spite of everything, I still end up in the
hospital. Maybe hes right, maybe it doesnt
matter.
Michael: It does matter! The most important - you have to
believe it does.
[Michael wants to kiss him, but Ben reluctant.]
[Horvath has dinner at
Debbies.]
Debbie: More meat?
Carl: No, three gams and I've stuffed.
Debbie: Now I have fruit for desert - I dunno if there's
so excited.
Carl: With you in the room what could be?
Debbie: I'll get the fruit.
[she stands up, but Carl leads Debbie at his lap.]
Carl: Forget the fruit - I'll got a better idea.
Debbie: I'm too heavy.
Carl: Your beautiful.
Debbie: I'll have a confession to make. I'm a little
nervous.
Carl: About what?
Debbie: About this. I wanna be with you - it's just it's
been a long time.
Carl: How long?
Debbie: Last century.
Carl: Don't worry about it. I'll promised to be gentle.
Maybe I'll teach you a few things.
[They kiss each other.]
[Cut to the loft. Brian is
examining Justins poster. Justin is standing
tensely, arms folded across his chest, halfway across the
room. ]
Brian: The expression on his face needs to be more
enticing, but more foreboding. "Enter at your own
risk; prepare to be fucked."
Justin: I think I can manage that.
Brian: You could probably get a better view if you stood
a little closer.
[Justin moves in closer, standing next to Brian.]
Brian: And his hips need to be more in profile to
accentuate his cock.
Justin: Its always about sex!
Brian: Unless its about death, but death
doesnt sell tickets.
[Enter Michael.]
Michael: I've picked up Chinese food. I didn't know it
was for three.
Justin: I was just goin. Were done, right?
Brian: Right. How much do I owe you?
Michael: Foods on me.
Brian: In that case allow me to supply the other things.
[Later, after the dinner and with a joint. They giggle as
they read the old schoolbook.]
Brian: It just goes to show all life is a lesson.
Michael: Thats what Ben always says. His ex, Paul,
the one who infected him, died.
Brian: What a wonderful world. Youd have to be nuts
or a selfish piece of shit to want to bring a child into
it.
Michael: You did.
Brian: I'm sure as hell not to do it again, especially
not for Melanie. She can go to a sperm bank.
Michael: [giggle] Or scrape it off of the floor of the
backroom at Babylon!
Brian: Just give me one valid reason why any queer in his
right mind would want to bring a kid into this world.
Michael: [long pause] To piss off straight people!
[Cut again to Deb/Horvath
apres-sex.]
Debbie: You are not disappointed, are you?
Carl: Disappointed? I amazed.
Debbie: Really?
Carl: Escapially after all that lips and and how nervous
you are.
Debbie: What's that mean?
Carl: Oh, nothing.
Debbie: Don't do be nothing after a remark like that.
Carl: Let's just say no-one can do just you with a little
practise. From the way your... you know, lady, you could
teach a class. [laughs]
Debbie: Is that so?
Carl: In fact I've heart from Beverly Hills - they charge
a thousand dollars for...
Debbie: But I was telling you the truth. This is the
first time in years that I...
Carl: Yeah, sure. Whatever.
Debbie: You don't believe me? Well that's just fucking
bad. Now you better take your suspicions and your
suspendors and remove your butt from my bed!
Carl: Baby?
Debbie: NOW! OUT! GET OUT!
[Brian and Justin are walking
along Liberty Avenue.]
Brian: Here's your fee. Plus a hundred dollars bonus for
finishing on time.
Justin: Thanks.
Brian: And here's two tickets for tonight. One for you
and one for Ethan.
[Ethan comes along and kisses Justin.]
Brian: I just admiring your boyfriend lastest creation.
Ethan: An artist does his best work when he has somebody
he loves to inspire him.
Brian: So I've been told.
Justin: We should go.
Brian: See you tonight.
Justin: Oh, Brian gave us two tickets to the center
carneval.
Ethan: I'm sure it would be a blast but we're already had
our plans.
Brian: Oh well, you can change your mind - your names are
on the list.
[Justin and Ethan walk off arm in arm, Brian watches
them.]
[At the diner, Debbie with Ted
and Emmett.]
Debbie: The special today is the Dick of Death. Food
long, hot dog, creamy sauce on the side - don't make me
repeat it.
Both: Two specials.
Emmett: Wait, wait, wait. So, how was it?
Ted: Yeah, should your professor should give you a A?
Debbie: Yeah, for asshole. Cause that is all your fault.
Emmett: Well, he wasn't pleased?
Ted: Impossible. I've defight any male, living or dead,
not to response our tested technique.
Emmett: Provided you follow our instructions.
Debbie: Oh, I followed them. He responded every flick.
Ted: Since so what's the problem?
Debbie: The problem is he thinks Im a whore!
Emmett: Im so proud!
Debbie: Well, I never see him again.
[At the other table, Melanie's doin some work at a list
of names.]
Mel: What about A73? 6'2'', blue eyes and a menta?
Lindsay: Is that what you really want?
[Brian comes up with come cream.]
Brian: Cock cream? It's fresh from the morning. I've
melked myself.
[Lindsay giggles, but Mel didn't like it.]
Mel: That's disgusting.
Lindsay: [laughs] It's really disgusting.
Brian: Bitches are offering some hand. That's offering to
do.
Lindsay: Wait, do you really mean it?
Brian: Yeah, if it's a boy you can name it "Brian
jr."
Mel: And if it's a girl?
Brian: Charity in honor of my donation. Cmon,
lets go piss off some heterosexuals!
[Cut to Ben busting ass at the
gym, lifting weights like a maniac. Later he approaches
Tarzan in the locker room.]
Ben: Hey, I was wondering if you could me some help?
Troy: You always brought some.
Ben: Actually it's got more nutrition.
Troy: Come with me.
[Ted and Emmett go to the police
station.]
Emmett: Excuse us. Detective Horvath?
Carl: What...uh... can I do for you, boys?
Emmett: Uh, a dear friend of ours is in a little bit of
trouble.
Ted: Seems last night... a oral misscommunication
accured?
Carl: [to his partners] You haven't some work to do?
What's the hell is all this about?
Ted: Look, Debbie told us that you had sex, or some
heterosexual permutation there of.
Carl: Jesus Christ, why you hanging it on the billboard?
What we're doin in our bed isn't your business.
Emmett: Actually it is. See, Debbie was worried that she
wouldn't live up your expectations.
Ted: That she let you down. So, we gave her a crash
course.
Emmett: Introduction of fellatio one-on-one.
Ted: Emmett's the worlds theorities.
Emmett: Anyway, young Deborah passed with honors...
Ted: Magnacum laudly.
Emmett: In fact she did so well you apparently...
Ted: ...missguided her.
Emmett: And think she's a slut. The truth is, detective,
we're the sluts.
Ted: Speak for yourself. Look, under all that dirty talk
Debbie is just an old fashion girl who's only cry was
only to please her man.
[Cut to the party. Justin is
bored witless.]
Boy#1: Remember certain final is out of competition.
Ethan: Pook Marta, she's astonishing talent but terrified
to perform.
Girl#1: And there is Georgio, musican at his best.
Ethan: Yeah, but he put in front of audience and they
dead.
Girl#1: You my dear has nothing to worry about it.
[Later. Justin smokes. Ethan goes to him.]
Ethan: Having fun?
Justin: Yeah, it's great.
Ethan: Liar.
Justin: No, your friends are really smart and funny. I
guess I'm just nervous, that's all.
Ethan: Dont be! Youre with me!
[He kisses Justin. One of Ethans friends walks up.]
Boy#2: So this is the imaginary boyfriend. Ethan tells me
youre an artist.
Justin: Thats right.
Boy#2: What kind of stuff do you do?
Justin: Lately Ive been manipulating classical form
with digital imagery.
Boy#2: So youre not just a pretty face.
Justin: No. I got a pretty big cock as well. And I give
one hell of a blowjob. Right Ethan?
[Cut to Babylon and the
Carnival.]
Man: Welcome to Carnival! Start with the butthole bingo.
Whip-o-rama! And flaming dildo!
[At butthole bingo - the guy take the balls up in his ass
and throw some out. Kinda new form of lottery.]
Man: B-13
[The GLC people are appalled.]
Brian: Of 800 people are waiting to get in.
Lindsay: Jesus Brian.
Tannis: What is all this?
Man: I-19.
Brian: This is butthole bingo. And that is the remarkable
gift of that young man.
Tannis: That was not on the proposal you've submitted.
Brian: Yeah, I took a few liberties.
Philip: This was supposed to give a positive gay image.
What kind of message do you think we're sending here?
Brian: That all man created horny and it's ok.
Mel: You really gone to far.
Brian: Yeah well in any consulation to me, we're making
10k out of his ass.
Man: O-69.
[At Ethan's party. Justin wants
to leave.]
Justin: I'm gonna take-off.
Ethan: Well, already?
Justin: Yeah, I'm beat.
Ethan: Alright, I'll go with you.
Justin: No, you can stay here. I see you at home.
Ethan: You sure?
Justin: Yeah.
Ethan: OK, love you.
Justin: You too.
[They kiss goodbye and Justin leaves.]
[At Debbie's home. Carl knocks at
Debbies door.]
Carl: Can I come in?
[Debbie says no word. She goes inside. They sit at the
kitchen table.]
Carl: You just finishing dinner?
Debbie: I just starting. Three pounds of chicken, four
pounds of lemon meat.
Carl: Is that enough to keep up your stress?
Debbie: Right, I have ten blowjobs to give before I'm
done.
Carl: I wish you wouldn't talk like that.
Debbie: So experts talk.
Carl: Yeah, I know. Two guys came to the police station
today. That tall switch twink...
Debbie: Emmett?
Carl: And the one who looks like an accountand.
Debbie: Ted.
Carl: They explain all about your... education. How you
went to the head of the class.
Debbie: Well Emmett's get a big mouth. What else did they
tell ya?
Carl: That you did it for me. To please me.
Debbie: I wouldn't do that for just anyone, you know?
Carl: I know. Do you have any idea what that mean to me
that you want to give me a pleasure that much?
Debbie: I though that would people do when they care
about each other.
Carl: Which is why I enlisted detective carefully. There
are two lesbians and they told me a little crash course
of my own.
Debbie: No!
Carl: Oh yeah.
Debbie: And how did go?
Carl: It was very informative. In fact if you care to
retire to the bootwar I have a homework assignment to do.
[Back to Brians Filthy
Carnival. Ted and Emmett try to throw some ring about a
dildo. Ted succeeded.]
Michael: You have the perfect aim.
Ted: Yeah, expect the morning when I have to pee. Oh,
this is for you.
Emmett: My hero.
Michael: That reminds me of Ben.
Ted: It's too bad he couldn't come to Brians Filthy
Carnival.
Michael: He's still bumped out about Paul.
[At spot Ben comes in, in a really good mood.]
Michael: What are you doin' here?
Ben: I though there might be surprises.
[Home with the lesbians from the
carnival.]
Mel: Changed my ass. Brian's still the same irresponsible
fucker he always was.
Lindsay: On the other hand he did the center almost a
hundred thousand...
Mel: Yeah and humiliated them in the process.
Lindsay: That didn't stop them from accepting the money.
Mel: So it is a good reminder.
Lindsay: Of what?
Mel: That he is a loose cannon, not to be trusted. And
definately not that kind of person I want as the father
of my child.
Lindsay: Oh, c'mon!
Mel: I am serious.
Lindsay: No, you've been ridiculous.
Mel: You actually expected me to have a baby with someone
like that?
Lindsay: I did.
Mel: Well, that was your decision. This one is mine and I
say - I want someone else.
[Back to the carnvial. Justin
walks in. Brian spots him immediately.]
Brian: You made it.
Justin: Thought Id see how it was going.
Brian: Wheres Ian?
Justin: Ethan. Hes with his friends
Brian: You shouldve brought him.
Justin: No, I dont think so.
Brian: Maybe he wouldve learned a few things they
dont teach in college.
[half naked guy sidles up to Brian]
Justin: Guess Id better go.
Brian: Tell him that we've missed him.
[Outside Babylon, a guy is sitting on Brians new
car.]
Brian: You want to move your ass?
Guy: A cool car.
Brian: Thanks.
Guy: I always want to have one.
Brian: No shit.
Guy: Most have cost a lot.
Brian: Actually it was a charity contribution. You want
to take you for a ride?
Guy: I like that.
[They get in and drive away.]
Music:
Infra Riot -
The Soundtrack of Our Lives
END OF EPISODE==========================
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