Open on an overview of the Las Vegas strip at night. Fade to view of a hotel penthouse with an older man and young woman.

Sheryl Thorn: (putting on an earing) Have you seen my earring?

Daniel Thorn: Why can’t I just write these people a check and stay home? (putting on a coat) Nobody’s gonna miss me.

Sheryl: You’re not getting out of this one. Half the people are coming just to have their picture taken with the great Daniel Thorn. Besides, you bought me this dress just for tonight. Remember?

Daniel: Yeah. (they laugh and kiss each other) I really do have impeccable taste, don’t I?

Sheryl: Me or the dress?

Daniel: Both.

Sheryl: (her long scarf gets caught in a door, jerking her neck) Oh-

Daniel: (Daniel frees her scarf) This thing is gonna kill you some day.

Sheryl: I have to wear it darling, it’s my trademark. (looks at her watch) And we’re late, which is my other trademark. (puts on some different earrings) I’ll just wear these.

They walk to the elevator, where Daniel presses the button. The doors open, and the two walk in.

Daniel: (a hotel cook walks into view outside the elevator car) Save me Roberto, how 'bout you go to this stupid benefit? I’ll stay here. (he presses him thumb on the finger print scanner in the elevator and the down button)

Roberto:          I can’t help you, Mr. Thorn. Have a good evening.

The doors close and Daniel puts his arm around Sheryl.

The crowded lobby of the hotel. The doors of the elevator open onto a roped off area, and a bell hop walks over to the couple.

Lewis: Mr. T, your car is right out front, and I put a couple of diet sodas in there two.

Daniel: (placing his hand on Lewis’s shoulder) Thank you Lewis.

Photographer: Mr. Thorn, over here, one picture! (the press start clicking away)

Daniel: (Sheryl starts looking through her purse) What is it?

Sheryl: Oh… Do you have the tickets?

Daniel: No, I-I thought you had them (he looks through his coat pockets)

Sheryl: Oh, I must have left them upstairs. I’ll go. You stay, and meet your adoring public.

She enters the elevator again as Daniel smiles for the cameras. Sheryl’s scarf gets caught in the elevator doors as they close.

Daniel: Sheryl, your scarf is caught. (the scarf moves up the crack between the doors) Sheryl!

Sheryl (from in the elevator): Oh, Daniel, oh! Somebody help me! (Daniel grabs a piece of the scarf from the doors that has ripped off)

Daniel (on cell phone): Roberto, get to the elevator. Check on Mrs. Thorn, it’s that dam scarf again. Just make sure she’s ok!

We see the crowd murmuring before action switched to the elevator as the doors to the penthouse open. Sheryl is lying on the floor motionless with the scarf still on her neck. Roberto rushes to her.

Roberto (on cell phone):          Mr. Thorn, you’d better come up – it’s Mrs. Thorn. I think she’s dead. (Daniel slowly closes the cell phone during a fade out)

Open on a ticking alarm clock (3:10AM) in Monk’s apartment as the phone starts to ring. Monk stirs and answers the phone.

Adrian Monk: Hello?

Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Hey Monk! You awake? Listen, there was a murder here last week! (He is in a casino lobby where he appears to be drunk) You know Daniel Thorn?

Monk: Daniel Thorn?

Stottlemeyer: Daniel Thorn. The son of a bitch murdered his wife, and he tried to make it look like an accident, and I can prove it. (Monk looks at his alarm clock) Monk, I solved the case! At least I think I did. Hey, hey! (stops a waitress carrying alcohol) Keep ‘em comin’. Ha pam! (looking at the waitress)

Monk: Have you been drinking?

Stottlemeyer: Me? Yeah, a little bit. Listen Monk, I need you man, I need you to come to Vegas. I need a second opinion. I’m staying at the uh, Montecello Casino, Uh… Room 3473.

Monk: Vegas – Las Vegas?

Song: (during more shots of Las Vegas during the day) There’s just one place for me – this is it. Yeah, just one place to be – this is it. I’m so happy to be here, when I look around it’s clear, yes it’s perfectly plain to see. (inside a casino next to roulette, settling on Monk and Natalie as they walk through the floor) There’s a cream of the crop – this is it… (slow fade out)

Natalie Teeger: Welcome to Sin City, Mr. Monk.

Monk: Some kind of holiday?

Natalie: Nope, it’s like this 24 hours a day, all the time; people come from all over the world just to give their money away.

Monk: They look miserable.

Natalie: They are miserable. You might be the happiest person here. (a woman hits a jackpot at a slot machine and screams, and Monk jumps) You alright? This is nothing, wait til the tour buses show up, this place is gonna be packed.

Monk: How do you know?

Natalie: I’ve lived here for two years, I was a blackjack dealer.

Monk: I didn’t know that.

Natalie: I’ve been a lot of things you don’t know about.

Monk: Really, like what?

Natalie: Like it’s none of your business.

Monk: Have you ever done hard time?

Natalie: Do you think I’ve done hard time?

Monk: Maybe.

Natalie: Ok, this way.

Stottlemeyer’s hotel room – Stottlemeyer, Disher, and several other members of the SFPD are lying in various places in a trashed room with empty pizza boxes and Chinese food cartons everywhere. Knocking at the door gets increasingly violent until Stottlemeyer gets up.

Stottlemeyer: (as he knocks over a beer bottle) Sheeze. Where’s my pants? Hey Randy, where’s my pants?

Lieutenant Randall “Randy” Disher:      (half asleep) You threw em out the window.

Stottlemeyer: Why did I do that?

Disher: Ah, the girls bet you a dollar you wouldn’t.

Stottlemeyer: (while trying to put a robe on, he takes a dollar out of his boxers) Looks like she paid off. (more knocking) Coming, I’m coming! Quit with the pounding! (he looks through the peep hole)

Stottlemeyer: Which one of you idiots invited Monk?

Various men in the room:         Wasn’t me. Not me. Come on… (he opens the door anyway to see Monk and Natalie)

Stottlemeyer: Hey, Monk, Natalie. What are doing here?

Natalie: You called him. Last night, you told him to come…

Stottlemeyer: Wha, I called you?

Monk: You said there’d been a murder.

Stottlemeyer: Heh, what the hell are you talking about?

Natalie: Can we come in?

Stottlemeyer: Yeah. (Monk and Natalie walk into the room while some of the residents try to make themselves more presentable)

Natalie: Wah, hoh hoh hoh! Did you guys have fun?

Stottlemeyer: I don’t know.

Natalie: What’s the occasion?

Disher: (mumbling) …Finnegan’s bachelor party.

Monk: Sargent Finnegan no, I just talked to him last week, he’s not having a bachelor-

Man 1: Uh, yeah, he must have changed his mind at the last minute. (shoving a door shut someone was trying to get through) We tried to call you.

Man 2: (holding up a bag) Hey look, striper left her makeup bag. (Monk looks up, and everyone starts looking at each other guiltily)

Monk: Strippers…

Stottlemeyer: Uh, it’s ok Monk, cause me and uh, the other married guys, we-we went down the hall until she left. (Monk nods)

Disher: (tying his shoes) Ok, I’ll meet you guys later. I’m gonna go hit the tables.

Natalie: How’s your luck?

Disher: Great, I’m only down a couple hundred. (he gets up)

Natalie: What cha playing?

Disher: Blackjack.

Natalie: Why don’t you go next door, the Mirage has some five dollar tables?

Stottlemeyer pours himself some water

Disher: Five bucks? (buttoning up his shirt) Those are the kiddie tables, I’m here to make some real money. I got a system. (he pulls out a book titled “Winning Big”)

Natalie: (sarcastically) Oh, I didn’t know you had a book. Then you can’t lose!

Disher: Come on down, see for yourself, you can help me count my chips. (Natalie laughs and Disher exits through the door)

Stottlemeyer: (after taking a gulp of water) Hey, wait a minute, I called you Monk.

Monk: Right.

Stottlemeyer: Yeah, I ca- I solved something, it was big.

Natalie: Yeah, you said Daniel Thorn murdered his wife.

Monk: You said you had proof.

Stottlemeyer: I did? (Monk looks at his watch)

Back on the casino floor, Monk is leading Stottlemeyer to the elevator.

Monk: Ok, this way, over here. Right this, this is where she was killed, does any of this look familiar?

Stottlemeyer: I don’t know. (he opens a bottle of medication and swallows a handful)

Monk: Wait, your-your only supposed to take two of those.

Stottlemeyer: (reading the label to Monk) As necessary.

Monk: You-you don’t remember anything, nothing?

Stottlemeyer: Um, I know I left the party, upstairs at about 1:30

Monk: Ok, ok, were you alone?

Stottlemeyer: Uh, I don’t know. I came down, I played some craps, lost some money… I talked to someone!

Monk: Good, there you go, who?

Stottlemeyer: He was a man. Or a woman.

Monk: Oh, man, or a woman, that narrows it down. So-so-so-so it wasn’t a child?

Stottlemeyer: Could have been…

Natalie: (enters carrying an envelope) All right, got the file. Leutenant Wallover said don’t make any copies of it, and I have nice eyes. (hands the file to Stottlemeyer who looks through it)

Stottlemeyer: Ok, cause of death: ligature, strangulation, and a broken neck.

Natalie: Wallover said you’re wasting your time, it was an accident, she strangled on her own scarf.

Monk: Ok, let’s check it out.

They walk towards the elevator and unhook one of ropes guarding it, when the bell hop notices them.

Lewis: (cough) Um, excuse me, these are private elevators, the public elevators are across the lobby…

Stottlemeyer: Yeah um (holding up his badge), PD. We’re just gonna look around a little bit, ok?

Lewis: Uh, sure, sure, hey. What’s uh, going on? Can I help?

Monk: Were you on duty, the night Mrs. Thorn was-

Lewis: Why, is this like, an insurance thing?

Stottlemeyer: No, this is a – we ask you some questions, and you answer – thing.

Lewis: Ok, ok, but you owe me one. Here’s what happened: They got off the elevator, Sheryl, that’s Mrs. Thorn, said, “Do you have the tickets?” Eh, Daniel, Mr. Thorn, checked his pockets – no – she got back on the elevator, elevator doors closed, and her scarf got caught, you could hear her screaming from inside, “Help me, Daniel, help me”. (Monk notices the elevator button and presses it with his elbow, which causes the doors to open behind Lewis) That’s pretty much it, they found her upstairs.

Monk: And she was definitely alone?

Lewis: Oh yeah, I was standing right there. (points off-screen)

Stottlemeyer: I got a question. Were you working last night, at 2 o’clock? (Monk and Natalie look inside the elevator)

Lewis: Oh, yes sir.

Stottlemeyer: Was I here?

Lewis: Were you here?

Stottlemeyer: I mean, do you remember me, did we talk?

Lewis: No sir, I’ve never seen you before.

Stottlemeyer: Exactly, we’ve never met. Right, I was just testing you, you pass, good job. (he pats Lewis on the back who smiles) Uh, um, we’re just gonna be a minute, ok?

Lewis: Ok.

Stottlemeyer: Thank you.

Lewis: Yeah. (Stottlemeyer moves into the elevator)

Monk: So it’s an express?

Stottlemeyer: Yeah, it goes straight to the penthouse, nonstop. There’s an access panel. (pointing up)

Monk: Can we get up there?

Stottlemeyer: Monk, we’re not supposed to be here, let’s make it quick (he sees Lewis talking on the phone)

Natalie: Hey look, thumbprint scanner. (pointing at the wall)

Monk: Yeah…

Natalie: This elevator doesn’t move for anyone but Thorn or his wife.

Stottlemeyer: Yeah right, it’s all here, look. See, Daniel Thorn uh, pressed the elevator scanner at 5:52, to come down, and then Sheryl Thorn pressed the scanner at 5:55, three minutes later to go back up in the elevator.

Monk: So, it was definitely her…

Stottlemeyer: Yeah, positive ID. (pointing at the file)

Natalie: (Monk starts turning his thumb at different angles) What are you doing?

Monk: Look-look, it’s odd, look at her thumb print, it’s at a weird angle. (now both Monk and Stottlemeyer are turning their thumbs) Why would she press it like that (holding thumb at an angle upside down), I would have pressed it like that (pressing the scanner with a straight thumb, and the scanner glows red, denying him access), wouldn’t you?

Natalie: Mm, hm.

Stottlemeyer: Yeah, that is weird. (he continues pressing the scanner)

Natalie: (Monk notices something on the side of the car) What is that?

Monk: It’s a finger nail. (points to a broken finger nail with red nail polish) It’s dug right into the leather…

Natalie: It probably broke off when she was choking to death.

Monk: No, I don’t think so, she’s too far away from the door.

Stottlemeyer: What do you think?

Monk: I think you were right. Something happened in here, it was murder. (fade out)

Fade in on a build site for the Sheryl Thorn Pediatric Hospital, where Daniel Thorn is making a speech on a platform which Monk and Natalie are watching.

Daniel: You know some people thought that we should reschedule this ground breaking ceremony after what happened last week. But I know that Sheryl would want us here today. As you know, she and I were uh, never able to have children of our own, so she always considered this project, this hospital to be her baby, our baby. If in a hundred years…

Monk: He didn’t love her.

Natalie: How do you know?

Monk: I know. (he looks at Daniel)

Daniel: …With my casinos, or my best seller books. No, it will be for this hospital, so lets get started on this hospital. (he takes off his coat amongst applause and steps off the platform) Will somebody hold this? (Monk takes the coat and Natalie starts searching through it)

Monk: What are you doing?

Natalie: Poking around.

Monk: You can’t do that.

Natalie: I can do anything I want, I’m cute.

Daniel: (after digging the first hole with a shovel) I want to thank everyone for coming out here today. (we see Monk and Natalie find something in his coat) So let’s get this thing built, ok? (applause) Ah thanks, I appreciate that. (to Monk for holding his coat)

Natalie: Uh, Mr. Thorn, do you have a minute?

Daniel: Yeah, sure. (he takes a pen out of his pocket)

Natalie: No, no, no sir, we don’t want your autograph. My name is Natalie Teeger, this is Adrian Monk, we’re here with some homicide detectives from San Francisco.

Daniel: Oh, I hope you’re staying here at the Monticello.

Natalie: Yes sir, we are.

Monk: We just have some questions about your wife, and how she died.

Daniel: (slightly uncomfortable) Oh you do. Well uh, we have our own police force here, Mr. Monk, and uh, they’ve already looked into it. If you want a copy of their report, I can assist you with that.

Monk: Well I, uh, I’ve already seen the report, sir uh, it doesn’t add up.

Daniel: Oh yeah, what doesn’t add up?

Monk: The night she died, the two of you were going to a fundraiser, at the Baker Street Pavilion.

Daniel: Yeah, that’s right, it was a fundraising concert, for this hospital.

Monk: Right, but she forgot the tickets, and that’s why she went back upstairs.

Daniel: Yeah.

Monk: (taking up the object they found in Daniel’s coat) These, were in you pocket, sir. Baker’s Street Pavilion, May 2nd.

Daniel: Oh, I uh, I didn’t realize they were there, you know if I’d of know, she’d be alive today.

Monk: We’ve spoken to some witnesses. They said that you looked for the tickets, they said you checked your pockets-

Daniel: (angry) They were mistaken! Look-look, why don’t you just relax here, Mr. Monk. Huh, you’re in Las Vegas, do some gambling, I’d be happy to comp for you and your friend here.

Monk: I don’t gamble.

Daniel: Well then, have a drink.

Monk: (shrugging) I don’t drink.

Daniel: (counting on his fingers) Well, you don’t gamble, you don’t drink, you want to know a secret? I don’t either, ha, ha. You and I, we got a lot in common, Mr. Monk.

Monk: Yes, we do. My wife was murdered too.

Daniel: Nah, Sheryl wasn’t murdered.

Monk: I think she was.

Daniel: We’re done here. (he takes his coat back from Monk) Goodbye, Mr. Monk, Ms. Teeger.

Natalie: Mr. Thorn. (Daniel leaves)

After another shot of the Las Vegas strip, we are back on the casino floor with Monk, Natalie and Stottlemeyer

Monk: Ok, just take your time, does any of this look familiar?

Stottlemeyer: Maybe that way? Hey there’s Randy. Randy! Randy! (Disher is holding his book in his mouth and counting money) How you doin’?

Disher: (incredulously) Hey, uh, I’m down. But, that’s to be expected. Money is like the tide, it ebbs and it flows – it’s all in the book. (holds up the book) Right now I’m uh, sort of ebbing.

Stottlemeyer: Uh, son, exactly how much are you ebbing?

Disher: Down 800. But, that’s not including the complementary breakfast and all the free drinks. (Monk and Stottlemeyer figit) Don’t panic, don’t panic, the worst thing you can do is panic, it’s all in the book. Hey uh, how’s the case coming?

Monk: Actually, we’re in-

Disher: Great, great, I want to hear all about it, later. (he sits down at a blackjack table)

Dealer: Hi, how are ya?

Disher: Julie? I’m back! Let’s play.

Dealer: All right, here you go. (camera moves off Disher)

Stottlemeyer: That bar. (he points forward) I’ve been in that bar. (the two walk to a bar in the casino)

Man 1: Hey, here he is!

Woman 1: That’s the man!

Man 1: This is the guy!

Monk: I think you’ve been here before.

Bartender: Lieland, how you feeling, brother? I figured you’d be back, you forgot this. (he takes down a trophy off the back shelf next to an older woman at the bar) Everybody is still talking about it, man.

Woman 2: Thank you for last night.

Stottlemeyer: (uneasy) You’re welcome.

Monk: (reading the trophy) 1st Place Karaoke Contest?

Stottlemeyer: Karaoke?

Monk: Do you sing?

Stottlemeyer: Apparently. Look, last night is a bit of a blur – what did I sing?

Bartender: “Ain’t No Sunshine”.

Stottlemeyer: That’s a good song.

Woman 2: You made me cry. Sing it again.

Stottlemeyer: (slightly flattered) I don’t think so. Look um, did anything else happen? It’s kind of important.

Bartender: You did a lot of drinking, you were very thirsty.

Monk: Did he talk to anybody?

Bartender: Hell, he talked to everybody! You don’t remember anything?

Stottlemeyer: Um…

Bartender: Let’s see, you came in around 2 o’clock, you sang the song, you won the trophy, you threw up, and you collapsed in a table over there. (Stottlemeyer walks over to the table)

Monk: Was he alone? (he follows Stottlemeyer to the table and sits down)

Bartender: I didn’t notice. About ten minutes later, you came back, you were all excited, and you kept saying, “I solved that case!”

Stottlemeyer: Anything else?

Bartender: No sir, you just ran outside, looking for a payphone.

Monk: You said at this table, you solved the case.

Stottlemeyer: Look uh, do you have any idea what I meant?

Bartender: (shaking his head, chuckling) No.

Woman 2: I do. You told me all about it. (Monk and Stottlemeyer walk over to her again)

Stottlemeyer: Um, what exactly did I say?

Woman 2: I'll tell you on one condition.

Back on the casino floor, Natalie walks towards Lewis, who is reading a book, taking notes.

Natalie: (she knocks on the desk, Lewis looks us and closes his book) Hi, remember me?

Lewis: Ms. Teeger, room 1523.

Natalie: Wow, you’re pretty good, you’re gonna own this place someday!

Lewis: That’s the plan, give me five years.

Natalie: Look, my friend Adrian Monk just checked in-

Lewis: (nodding) Room 1525.

Natalie: That’s right. Anyway uh, he’s a little peculiar, he has to have 60 watt light bulbs on all the lamps…

Lewis: 60 watt… Uh, did you try guest services?

Natalie: Yeah, there are then people in front of me. Could you help me out? I would so appreciate it

Lewis: Done, but you owe me one. (smiling)

Natalie: All right. (Natalie sees the book he was reading, “Richer Than God” by Daniel Thorn) Is that Daniel Thorn’s book?

Lewis: Yeah.

Natalie: You must be a pretty big fan, huh?

Lewis: I’d say I’m more of a student. I keep my eyes open, I mean you can learn more in this lobby than you can in any business school.

Natalie: I’m sure you can, Lewis. (she leans on the desk) I’ll bet you have some great stories.

Lewis: Heh, well… Let’s just say if I wrote a book about Thorn, about the things I’ve seen, it’d be pretty wild. (they both chuckle) I have a perfect view of who comes and goes, and who comes and goes with who.

Natalie: Ah, do you really? (starting to flirt with Lewis, who smiles)

Back at the bar, Stottlemeyer steps up to a karaoke screen and microphone playing “Ain’t No Sunshine”, while the woman from the bar looks on eagerly.

Stottlemeyer: (singing quietly) Ain’t no sunshine when she’s gone. It’s not warm when she’s away. Ain’t no sunshine when she’s gone (Natalie walks into the room next to Monk)

Monk: Don’t ask

Stottlemeyer: She’s always gone too long, any time she goes away. Wonder this time, where she’s gone. (Monk and Natalie are very amused) Wonder if she’s gone to stay.

Woman 2: Do the dance, you did a little dance!

Stottlemeyer: Ain’t no sunshine when she’s gone, (he starts moving his arms a little) she’s always gone too long, any time she goes away.

Woman 2: Turn around, I want to see your tush.

Stottlemeyer: (regretfully turning around) I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know-

Woman 2: Those are different pants, where are the jeans?

Stottlemeyer: (hanging up the microphone) Look lady, a deal is a deal. I sang the song, now tell me what I said last night.

Woman 2: All you said was, “They don’t match”.

Stottlemeyer: They don’t match? What doesn’t match?

Woman 2: I don’t know, you didn’t say.

Stottlemeyer: Wait-wait-wait, is-is that it, is that all you got?

Woman 2: Please, sing it again? I just love the way you sing.

Stottlemeyer: (leaving towards Monk and Natalie, both smiling) Thank you.

Monk: You were good.

Stottlemeyer: Shut up.

Natalie: Daniel Thorn has a mistress, she’s a dancer at another casino.

Stottlemeyer: And how do you know that?

Natalie: Lewis the bell boy told me.

Monk: He told you, just like that?

Natalie: Mm, hm.

Monk: Oh that’s right, you’re cute.

Backstage of a theater at a casino where dancers in elaborate costumes are performing. Monk is standing with his back to the women.

Music: Come see me tonight, I know the time is right. For a rendezvous, only me and you-

Natalie: Mr. Monk, they’re not naked.

Monk: They’re nakedish.

Natalie: (agreeing) Well you can’t argue with that, they are nakedish. Where’s the captain?

Monk: He went back to get Randy out of the casino, he’s down 4000 dollars.

Natalie: He’s never gonna leave, nobody walks away, it’s like a drug. I used to gamble, I had a big problem, that’s why I left. (to a man backstage) Sir, Teresa Telenko?

Man: Yeah. (he points onstage)

Monk: Is he pointing?

Natalie: Yes, he’s pointing.

Monk: Where is he pointing?

Natalie: To a woman. She’s walking this way. (the woman rushing off that hit Monk with their feathered costumes, who recoils) Excuse me, Ms. Telenko? Hi, I’m Natalie Teeger, this is Adrian Monk.

Monk: (still looking away) We-we’re working with the police department, looking into the death of (another woman hits Monk) Sheryl Thorn.

Teresa: Why are you telling me?

Natalie: Because you’re sleeping with her husband. (she shakes her head) Sweetie, it would take us half a day to check your phone records.

Teresa: Ok, maybe that’s true, but that’s my business. It has nothing to do with his wife or what happened.

Monk: (as he turns around he looks up sharply to avoid looking at her) Ms. Telenko, we already checked. The night Mrs. Thorn was killed, you called in sick, you missed the show.

Teresa: Is he blind?

Natalie: Define blind.

Teresa: I-I called in sick because I was sick, I miss a lot of shows. Do you like to see a note from my doctor? What happened to Sheryl Thorn was an accident. She was on that elevator alone and she choked to death.

Monk: I don’t think so. (someone brushes their costume right in his face and he recoils again)

Teresa: Look, if you’re going to accuse me of something, the lease you can do is look me in the eye.

Natalie: Mr. Monk, come on.

Monk: (holding his hand so he can only see her face) Thorn killed her. I don’t know how he did it, but he did it. I think you knew something about it, either before the fact or after.

Teresa: Are you arresting me?

Monk: No.

Teresa: Then I have a show to do, excuse me.

Monk: (speaking to the wall) Ms. Telenko. When you talk to Mr. Thorn, you tell him that I’m not going anywhere. Tell him that he’s smart, but I’m smarter, and I am gonna figure out how he did it. (she leaves) Is she still there? (Natalie walks away on fade out)

Fade up on Monk and Natalie waking into the elevator area of the casino.

Monk: Where’s your boyfriend?

Natalie: Sent him out, told him I needed a special kind of shampoo.

Monk: Boy, looks like you have superpowers.

Natalie: It’s a gift.

Monk: And a curse?

Natalie: No, just a gift. Alright, we have about ten minutes.

Monk: Let me have the scarf.

Monk takes a scarf from Natalie as the doors open. They both walk into the elevator, and Monk puts the scarf on Natalie’s neck, leaving an end where the doors will close.

Natalie: What are you doing?

Monk: We’re reenacting the crime, you’re the victim.

Natalie: Wha-what if the elevator starts up, it’ll get caught again!

Monk: It’s not gonna get caught.

Natalie: Well, then you be the victim. (she unwraps the scarf from her neck)

Monk: No-no-no-no-no, Sharona was always the victim.

Natalie: Yeah, I’m sure she was. (Natalie starts putting the scarf on Monk)

Monk: No, I-I can’t be the victim. (taking the scarf off of him) I’m the detective, I have to step back and observe the scene.

Natalie: Well, I can observe stuff too! a. This is a crime scene-

Monk: No-no-no-no, you don’t look, you don’t know what to look for, ok? We have a system, it’s a good system. There’s an old saying. Don’t change anything. Ever.

Natalie: That’s an old saying?

Monk: I’ve been saying it for years. (he holds the scarf out to Natalie for her to take it, and she crosses her arms)

In the penthouse, Daniel Thorn is talking on his cell phone.

Daniel: I know it’s only 2 million dollars, but 2 million here, 4 million there, after a while we’re talking about real money. (he presses the elevator button) Yeah, the answer is no!

He closes his cell phone and adjusts his collar in the mirror. Down in the elevator, Monk is adjusting the scarf on his neck.

Monk: Ok, I’m Mrs. Thorn.

Natalie: Wai-wai-wai-wait… (she adds another knot to the scarf) Oh, that’s fantastic on you by the way.

Monk: All right, all right, we walk out. (he throws the end of the scarf behind him and te two walk into the lobby) We stop, (he snaps) I forgot the tickets. We look for the tickets (they look for the tickets) I must have left them upstairs. I walk back to the elevator (they go back to the elevator), I press P for Penthouse, the doors close, the scarf gets caught.

Natalie: Maybe somebody was hiding up there. (she points to the access panel at the top)

Monk: Now, that’s possible, but Mrs. Thorn was yelling about the scarf, not about some attacker…

Natalie: Yeah.

Monk: So she’s alone, she presses her thumb…

He puts his thumb on the scanner. Immediately after that, Daniel Thorn presses the call button for the elevator in his penthouse. The elevator starts to move and Monk’s neck is jerked back. His head hits the elevator doors, and he begins to choke. Natalie rushes to help him.

Natalie: Mr. Monk, oh my god! Here, I have a knife, hold on. (she takes a pocket knife out and starts cutting the scarf off his neck) Hold on, hold on. Almost got it, almost got it! Ok there, there! (the elevator doors open to the waiting Daniel Thorn, and he sees Monk and Natalie on the floor of his elevator, paralleling his wife’s murder)

Daniel: What are you doing, huh? Do you think this is funny? I mean, you-you rifle through my pockets-

Natalie: (helping Monk up as he gags across the floor) You’re stepping on it! (as he trips on the scarf)

Daniel: You make a mockery of me like this? I just buried my wife.

Natalie: We are not mocking you, Mr. Thorn, we are trying an experiment.

Daniel: I could have you arrested, and I’m going to.

Natalie: (Monk is trying to talk, but can only gag) Are you ok, do you need some water?

Monk: (coughing and in a weak, high voice) No, I’m ok, I’m ok.

Natalie: Ok.

Monk: (to Daniel) ah nak, oob blo gah nah-

Daniel: What?

Monk: Gah, ah bla gah, que sto

Daniel: Question for me? No-no I’m sorry, I’m on my way to a board meeting, I’m already late.

Monk: Wha gah, (cough) one minute.

Daniel: Did I do something to offend you sir? I mean, why don’t you let this thing go. What happened to my wife was an accident, ten witnesses saw her get onto the elevator alone, when it stopped, she was dead.

Monk: Lea se tha, they said that, they said your wife was screaming for help, and that she called your name.

Daniel: Yeah, that’s true, that’s true, I will never forget that moment.

Monk: But just now, I was being strangled by the scarf, like your wife, I-I couldn’t yell anything. I-I couldn’t even breath. How do you explain that, sir?

Daniel: I can’t explain it, can you? I loved my wife, Mr. Monk.

Natalie: Yeah, as much as you loved Terry Telenko?

Daniel: Yeah, I know you talked to Terry. Virtue is not one of my virtues. Sheryl knew that, and uh, she accepted it. She realized that being married to Daniel Thorn in this town, had other compensations. Eh, you, you don’t have any idea who you’re dealing with, do you? Come here, let-let me show you something. (Monk and Natalie follow him to a table while Natalie helps Monk take the scarf off) The local rag, put this picture on the front page. (he holds up a tabloid, the Vegas Voice, “HELL-EVATOR!” with a picture of Sheryl dead; other titles – “Behind the Scenes of a Hollywood T.V. Classic”, “Winning lottery numbers”, “Lucky dates”, and “Your Own Get-Rich Horoscope”) Now, I asked them not to publish it, and they ignored me so yesterday morning, I bought thecontrolling interest in that company so I could personally fire that son of a bitch editor, and the photographer, and the publisher. Now you understand? Now that’s who you’re dealing with. I own this town. Now Ms. Teeger, you worked at the Bellagio.

Natalie: All right, so you’ve done your homework.

Daniel: Yeah, so why don’t you tell your friend what the first rule of Vegas is, the Golden Rule, the only rule! The house always wins. Always. (Monk rubs his sore neck and nods)

In the casino, outside the elevator. The doors open and a piece of scarf falls out from between them.

Natalie: Ah, there it is (picking up the piece)

Monk: It’s ruined now, you cut it all up.

Natalie: I saved your life!

Monk: You could’ve untied it.

Stottlemeyer: (Stottlemeyer rushes in) Hey Monk, Natalie, I’ve been looking all over for you guys. It’s Randy, he’s in way over his head. He’s lost his savings account, he’s gonna lose everything. (they follow Stottlemeyer to a blackjack table where Disher is flipping through his book, worried)

Disher: Hit me.

Dealer: Sorry sir, that’s a bust.

Natalie: (Stottlemeyer starts rubbing Disher’s neck, supporting him) It’s blackjack, you try to get as close to 21 without going over.

Monk: Yeah, I think I’ve heard of that game.

Natalie: It’s not a game, believe me. Hey Lieutenant, let’s go take a break.

Disher: Not now. (we see the cards being dealt). Hold on. (he flips trough the book again) Hit me.

Dealer: Sorry sir.

Time passes with Disher continuing to play. Monk begins to notice the cards and how the game is played.

Disher: Hit me.

Dealer: 8. 11.

Disher: Hit me.

Dealer: 16.

Disher: Hit me.

Dealer: 26, that’s a bust.

Stottlemeyer: So, exactly how much are you down?

Disher: 35.

Stottlemeyer: 35 thousand dollars? Where did you get 35 grand?

Disher: It’s easy, they lend it to you. Yeah, I’m in. (as the cards are dealt, Monk continues to observe) Stay.

Monk: No, take-take a card.

Natalie: No, he’s got 18, you don’t hit on 18.

Monk: Well the next cards low, a 3, maybe a 2. (Disher flips through his book)

Natalie: (whispering) Are you counting cards?

Monk: No, I’m remembering them.

Natalie: What do you mean you’re remembering them, that’s impossible, there are 8 decks in that shoe.

Monk: (to the dealer) One card please, hit him. Take the card.

Dealer: Sir?

Disher: Hit me. (he gets a 3 – 21, he wins and sighs on fade out)

Fade in on Disher (sitting on a couch) and Stottlemeyer in the hotel lobby.

Disher: I don’t know what happened. I was on fire, I couldn’t lose! I was up almost 8000 dollars, and then, I started to double and trle my bets, just like it says in the book, and the next thing I knew…

Stottlemeyer: Let me see the book, Randy. Let me see it. (Disher hands the book to Stottlemeyer, who proceeds to tear it up)

Disher: Whoa-whoa-what are you doing? How am I gonna win my money back?

Stottlemeyer: You stay there. If you go near those tables again without me I will shoot you in the leg. (he leaves Disher and meets Monk and Natalie on the casino floor) Well, a good friend of mine has a gambling problem, I need to do an intervention.

Disher: Maybe Randy could find a support group-

Stottlemeyer: I’m talking about you, Monk.

Monk: Me? I don’t gamble.

Stottlemeyer: Yeah, that’s a problem. You should gamble. See you could be in there right now gambling winning his money back.

Natalie: You can’t be serious.

Stottlemeyer: Look Monk, the kid is 35 grand in the hole. That is his savings account, his car payment, and the down payment on his mother’s condominium.

Monk: I can’t do it.

Stottlemeyer: Yes you can, I just saw you.

Natalie: Mr. Monk, don’t listen to him.

Stottlemeyer: Look just, you-you do that Rainman thing, count a few cards, it’ll take you an hour and a half.

Natalie: Wait, no-no-no, look at me, he has no idea what he’s talking about. Once you get a taste of it you will be hooked, for sure, you will never leave.

Stottlemeyer: You won’t get hooked.

Natalie: He gets hooked on everything, he’s the most compulsive person I’ve ever met, he’s like a different species.

Monk: Thank you.

Stottlemeyer: Look, I’ll be with you the whole time. We go in there, win the 35 grand back, and we walk away.

Natalie: Nobody walks away. Mr. Monk, don’t do it.

Stottlemeyer: Mr. Monk, it’s Randy. (Monk sees Disher desperately trying to put the book back together)

Monk: I have to do it, it’s Randy. And then, I’ll walk away, I promise. (Stottlemeyer leads Monk away from Natalie)

Back at the blackjack table, Stottlemeyer sits Monk down and gives him some money. Disher and Natalie stand behind him. Monk hands the money to the dealer, who gives him a chip.

Monk: (picking up the chip) Could I have a different chip, this one’s scratched. (the dealer gives him a different chip)

Stottlemeyer: It’s his first time.

Man: No kidding.

Stottlemeyer: (pulling Disher, who was leaning towards the table, back) Don’t even think about it.

Monk doesn’t realize the game has started, and he is brushing something off his part of the table. The hand motions are interpreted by the dealer as hit me, and continues to give him cards.

Dealer: 14, 16, 20, (Monk is still brushing off the table) 25, you bust.

Man: (incredulously) You hit 20?

Monk: I did? (the man and woman at the table laugh and Stottlemeyer brushes everything off the table) I need more money. (to Natalie; Monk then begins to play) Stay, hit me, hit me! Stay. Stay, stay, hit me! Hit me, stay! Hit me, stay. (Monk begins to rack up chips) I want to raise my bets. Hit me. Hit me. Hit me. Hit me! (he gets 21)

Dealer: Nicely played. (Stottlemeyer smiles) Hit me, stay. Sweet, stay. Hit me, hit me, stay. (he’s playing multiple positions at the table now)

Natalie: How you doing?

Monk: Good, I’m at 19,400.

Natalie: I mean how are you doing?

Monk: Hoh, I’m good. (chuckling, enjoying it too much, but sees her expression) I’m ok, I’m, ok.

Disher: Monk, I really this. Never gambling again, for as long as I live.

Stottlemeyer: Wanna bet?

Disher: Thousand bucks? Sorry.

Dealer: (Monk puts some chips forward) We can’t cover that, there’s a five hundred dollar limit.

Daniel: I think we can make an exception for Mr. Monk’s case. I mean, we’re not afraid of him, are we? Nah.

Dealer: You’re the boss.

Daniel: But first let’s make it a little more interesting. (he takes two decks from under the table and hands them to the dealer) Why don’t you add two more decks to the shoe?

Dealer: Yes, sir.

Natalie: Mr. Monk, that’s ten decks, that’s too many. (the dealer proceeds to shuffle the cards)

Monk: Bring it.

Daniel: If you’re trying to cheat me, Mr. Monk, we’ll catch you. I got friends, hiding in the ceiling. (he points up)

Monk: Friends, in the ceiling.

Daniel: That’s right.

Monk looks at the security cameras, and remembers something.

Flashback in the elevator-

Stottlemeyer: There’s an access panel above. (pointing up)

End flashback

Monk: I know how you did it. I know how he did it. (casually to the man at the table) He murdered his wife.

Man: Good for him. Congradulations. Let’s play cards.

Monk: Stay, hit me. Here’s what happened.

Murder flashback-

Monk: You and your wife went out to that fundraiser. She left the penthouse with you, but she never made it downstairs. (we see Daniel in the elevator, choking Sheryl with her scarf, and her finger nail breaking off) You killed her in the elevator on the way down. You had less than two minutes, but that’s all the time you needed. Cause after all, you had help. (we see Daniel looking up as Teresa lifts up the access panel)

End flashback

Man: Are you going to play, or not?

Monk: Sorry. Hit me.

Daniel: This man is delusional. Eh, he was discharged from the police force six years ago, he’s not even a real cop.

Stottlemeyer: Yeah, that’s true, but we are. Go on.

Switching between flashback and real life-

Monk: That wasn’t your wife in the lobby. That was Teresa Telenko, your mistress in disguise. (Teresa drops down some cables into the elevator) Come on, hit me! Stay. Teresa was a trained actress. Is that why you seduced her in the first place? I wonder. (after Daniel ties Sheryl to the cables, Teresa lifts her up, out of the elevator) I’ll split these. Stay, hit me! Double down, hit me. You hoisted her up through the access panel. Hit me again, and make it a ten. Genius. What is that, 17? I’ll stay. Hit me. Then Teresa took your wife’s place in the elevator. (Teresa jumps down next to Daniel) You had 45 seconds, that was plenty of time. Hit me, and… hit me. Stay, stay. The elevator door opened, and you two went into your act. (Daniel and Teresa walk out of the elevator) 2000, uptown and down. Let’s keep it sassy.

Natalie: You sure you wanna do that? You said you’d quit.

Monk: Natalie, I know what I am doing. When the door closed again, Teresa started to scream your name. Whoa, blackjack, I believe that’s the name of the game. (Teresa screams in the elevator while hoisting Sheryl down and pressing her thumbprint upside down on the glass to make the elevator move) Sheryl was already dead when she pressed the glass.

Natalie: That’s why her thumbprint was upside down.

Monk: Wait! I want to raise my bets. You said it yourself, you have friends hiding in the ceiling. It was the perfect plan. (Teresa goes back through the access panel) Everyone knew Sheryl was always catching her scarf on something. Nobody was surprised when it happened again. (Roberto finds Sheryl in the elevator)

Daniel: It’s a very interesting fairy tale, Mr. Monk. But that’s all it is, a fairy tale.

Disher: There might be something in the elevator shaft, blood, hair…

Daniel: You’d need a court order to even look, which you’re not gonna get, not in this town. So, unless you got something else-

Stottlemeyer: I did, I had it, I had proof, I just can’t remember it.

Daniel: Doesn’t matter, you’re leaving anyway. (he motions for several employees to come over, who take Monk away from the table)

Monk: This man here is been cheating, he’s been counting cards, I want him and his friends out of here now.

Monk: No, wait-wait-wah ten more minutes, come on I’m on fire, look, double down!

Daniel: No-no-no, I told you Mr. Monk, the house always wins. (Stottlemeyer and Disher stuff Monk’s chips in their clothes, and Daniel smirks at them)

At a roulette table, Monk moves someone’s bet

Man: Hey!

Monk: Trust me, even’s better

Employee: (as the man tries to move his bet) No more bets.

Man: What the hell- (the ball lands on 33)

Employee: 33 black. (the man looks around, dazed)

Stottlemeyer: That’s for you. (he hands a chip to the dealer who puts it in his pocket, and finish taking the rest of them before they run off)

Outside the casino, Monk, Natalie, Stottlemeyer and Disher have checked out and are leaving.

Natalie: Well you said you’d walk away.

Monk: I did, I walked away.

Natalie: You were dragged away, Mr. Monk. Should we call Lieutenant Wallover?

Stottlemeyer: He can’t do anything without proof.

Monk: (to Disher) That game with the dice, that looks like a lot of fun.

Disher: (counting his money) Craps? Yeah, you know I can show you how to play that. I’ve got a great book, it’s probably still-

Stottlemeyer: Randy! Give me the money, you’ll get it back when we get home.

Disher: I’m not ten years old.

Stottlemeyer: Yeah that’s true, give me the money (he takes the money)

Lewis: (coming out of the hotel carrying a bag with clothes in it) Mr. Stottlemeyer.

Stottlemeyer: (handing the money to Natalie) Here.

Lewis: Grounds keeping found these in the bushes. (he hands Stottlemeyer the bag) Are they yours?

Stottlemeyer: Yeah, these are my pants.

Lewis: Well don’t worry sir, what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.

Stottlemeyer: (taking a magazine out of the bag) Monk! Ha! Ha, ha, ha! This is it! Remember I was saying that they didn’t match, I was talking about the pictures. Look-look-look-look-look. (pointing to the picture of Sheryl on the tabloid) See, that’s her body, right? She’s wearing hoop earrings.

Monk: So?

Stottlemeyer: So, check this out. (he flips to another page with a picture of “Sheryl”, or rather Teresa, in the lobby) Moments before she gets on the elevator…

Natalie: Different earrings!

Stottlemeyer: Different girl.

Disher: I’ll call Wallover, that’s enough for a search warrant. (takes out his cell phone)

Monk: How many people read this paper, fifty thousand, nobody else caught it!

Stottlemeyer: So, that means, if wha-if I’m drunk as a skunk, completely plastered I’m as smart as you.

Monk: Smarter! (fade out)

Fade in on two police officers leading Daniel Thorn out of the casino, with Monk, Natalie, Disher and Stottlemeyer watching.

Disher: They found hair and rope fiber on top of the elevator.

Stottlemeyer: With that, and those photographs, we got it.

Daniel: Mr. Monk.

Monk: Daniel.

Stottlemeyer: Don’t go now Mr. Monk, this game of ours if far from over my friend. I will be out by tomorrow morning.

Monk: I wouldn’t bet on it. (Daniel leaves the casino, and the man from Monk’s blackjack table walks over to him)

Man: Hey professor. Hey, I-I’m playing a few hands, should I save you a seat?

Monk: I can’t, thanks. Good luck. (the man nods and leaves) You said you gambled?

Natalie: (walking towards their suitcases) I couldn’t stop. I was a mess.

Monk: But you walked away, how’d you do it?

Natalie: I had Mitch. How’d you do it?

Monk: I have you. (they smile and walk off camera during fade out)