CHARMED
5X16:  BABY'S FIRST DEMON
ORIGINAL AIR DATE ON WB:  03/30/2003
TRANSCRIBED FROM WB

Written by KRISTA VERNOFF
Directed by JOHN KRETCHMER

Transcript by Intrepid
Courtesy of http://www.webphilia.com/~anthology/wnp.html

Please do not archive without permission.

RATING: TV-PG-LV
==========================
DISCLAIMER:  
==========================
"CHARMED", "The Charmed Ones" and other related entities are owned, (TM) and (c) 
by CONSTANCE M. BURGE, AARON SPELLING Television Inc (A Paramount / Viacom Co.) 
and WB (AOL Time Warner Company). All Rights Reserved.  This transcript was made 
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For corrections / inaccuracies, please contact the Transcriptionist at 
(intrepidly002@yahoo.com)
==========================
SUMMARY:  Finding a name for the newest male addition of the family is the least 
of everyone's worries as they discover that a Bounty has been put out to kidnap 
the baby.  Piper struggles to find the strength to leave to fight demons and 
Phoebe finds herself attracted to her new boss.
==========================
CHARMED
5X16:  BABY'S FIRST DEMON
==========================



FADE IN.

[INT. MANOR - PIPER'S BEDROOM - DAY]

[BABY'S POV]

(Everyone is looking down into the bassinet.  PHOEBE is up front and closest to 
the baby's face.)

PHOEBE:  Ooh, I could eat him up!  I swear I could, with a little ranch 
dressing!

PIPER:  Ok, but let's not, ok?

PHOEBE:  I can't make that promise.

(Camera cuts to show us the baby in the bassinet.)

LEO:  Ok, don't listen to your aunties, ok?  They're a little kooky.  Us guys 
gotta stick together, don't we, Peter?

(PIPER looks at LEO.)

PIPER:  Peter?

LEO:  Peter.  I'm just ... floating it.

(PIPER thinks about it.)

PIPER:  Hmm.  (She leans down to look at her baby.)  Is your name Peter?

PHOEBE:  For what it's worth, I dated a guy in high school, and he wasn't very 
nice.

PAIGE:  Yeah, and you know, for what it's worth, it's kind of the name of the 
appendage that he has that surprised us all so much, and it might get him teased 
at school.

LEO:  Ok, no Peter, but we're running out of P's.

PAIGE:  Can't believe we never thought of "P" boy names.

PIPER:  Well, when I went to the future, I had a little girl, and obviously, 
that has changed, as has a lot of things, but, um ... I'm still having trouble 
letting go of the name we settled on.

PHOEBE:  Yeah, well, Prudence Melinda might get him in trouble at school, too.  

(She laughs.)

PAIGE:  I'm thinking that's probably true, although, he could just zap them onto 
a roof like Harry Potter would or something.

LEO:  God, I hope not.

PHOEBE:  Aren't you excited to see what his powers are?

PIPER:  Excited ... terrified ... I mean, after seeing what the kid could do 
inside the womb, he's no muggle.

PHOEBE:  Hey, what about Potter?  Potter Halliwell.  Or is it Wyatt?

LEO:  He's definitely a Halliwell.  Demons fear it, Good magic respects it, and 
I want what's best for him.  That's why I'm gonna say No to Potter.

(Everyone stops and looks at the baby.)

PIPER:  Oh, somebody's getting very sleepy.  (She looks at PHOEBE getting ready 
to eat the baby up.)  Come on. 

PHOEBE:  (to the baby)  We love you, we love you, baby, so much!  Love you, love 
you, love you!  

PAIGE:  Bye, baby.

(PHOEBE and PAIGE turn to leave the room.  PIPER leans down to tuck a blue 
blanket with an embroidered triquetra symbol on it around the baby.)

PIPER:  (whispers)  You're perfect, you perfect little creature.

(LEO watches and smiles.)

CUT TO:



[INT. MANOR - HALLWAY - DAY -- CONTINUOUS]

(Everyone walks out into the hallway.)

PAIGE:  It's too bad with all the powers your baby has, sleeping through the 
night is not one of them.

(PHOEBE walks into her room.  The others continue in the hallway.  PAIGE walks 
toward her room.)

PIPER:  Yeah, I'm sorry about that, guys.  Maybe we can cast some sort of sound 
proofing spell around our bedroom so you won't have to deal with it ...

(PAIGE whirls around and looks back at PIPER and LEO.)

PAIGE:  No way. It'll interfere with the baby's alarm system.

PIPER:  Which works how, exactly?

PAIGE:  Ah, pretty basic stuff.  I just enchanted a few cowrie shells.

LEO:  That's not gonna shock anything, is it?

PAIGE:  In the nursery?  I'm not a total idiot.  It'll just alert us to the 
presence of evil so we can all sleep a little sounder.  Now, if you'll excuse 
me, I need to apply some under-eye makeup to these dark circles that your sweet 
baby caused.

(PAIGE goes into her room and closes the door behind her.  PIPER and LEO turn 
around to see PHOEBE quietly sneaking out of her bedroom and heading in the 
direction of PIPER'S room where the baby is.)

PIPER:  Where are you going?

(PHOEBE stops and turns around, embarrassed.)

PHOEBE:  I'm just gonna go watch him sleep for a little while.

PIPER:  Phoebe, you must go to work.

LEO:  Aren't you supposed to meet the new owner of the paper today?

PHOEBE:  I know, but it's so hard to leave him.  Shouldn't there be some sort of 
maternity leave for new aunties?

PIPER:  Phoebe, the club is not raking in the dough these days and Paige is 
unemployed, the cost of diapers ... we kinda need you to keep your job.

PHOEBE:  You're right.  You're right. I'm going.  Just no Peter, ok?  And no 
Patrick, and I really think you should consider Potter, 'cause it's a great 
name, ok?  Just don't make any decisions until I get back, please.

PIPER:  Time to go.

PHOEBE:  ... and do me a favor and kiss his little toes for me when he wakes up.  
Ahhh !

(PHOEBE leaves.)

LEO:  When are you gonna talk to her?

PIPER:  Oh, she's just excited.

LEO:  Excited ... obsessed.

PIPER:  Why? Because she wants to watch her nephew sleep?

LEO:  No, because yesterday she was giving you breast-feeding advice, and now 
she wants maternity leave?

PIPER:  Well, she knows a lot about breasts ... and she's an aunt.  That's what 
they do.  It's family, you know.

LEO:  (smiles)  Ok. Well, how is mommy doing?

(LEO takes a step toward PIPER and puts his arms around her.)

PIPER:  Mommy's tired.  And happy.

(They kiss.)

LEO:  (murmurs)  Wanna try and get some sleep?

PIPER:  Mm-hmm.

(They kiss again.  The house alarms go off.  PAIGE bursts out of her bedroom.)

PAIGE:  The baby!

PIPER:  (looks up)  What?

PAIGE:   The baby!

(PAIGE pushes her way through PIPER and LEO.  She runs to PIPER'S bedroom.)

[INT. MANOR - PIPER'S BEDROOM - DAY --CONTINUOUS]

(PAIGE runs into the room and sees two demons standing over the bassinet.)

PAIGE:  Hey!  

(The two demons look up at PAIGE.  Just then, the baby produces a blue force 
shield around the baby's bassinet.  The force of the shield pushes the two 
demons away from the bassinet.  It pushes one into the wall and the other to the 
floor.)

(PIPER walks in and sees the demon that fell against the wall.  She waves her 
hands and the demon disintegrates into black demon dust.)

(She turns and looks for the second demon just as he vanishes from the room.)

PIPER:  (furious)  Son of a ...

(The baby starts to cry.  PIPER checks her anger and walks toward her baby.  The 
shield disappears.  LEO and PAIGE follow.)

LEO:  Way to go, little guy.  Way to use your powers!

(PIPER picks up the baby and starts to reassure him ... and herself.)

PIPER:  You ok?  No, you're ok.  It's all right.  You're okay.  

PAIGE:  Did they scare you?

PIPER:  (softly)  You're ok.  You're ok.

HARD CUT TO
END OF TEASER
ROLL TITLE CREDITS

(COMMERCIAL SET)



FADE IN

[EXT. (VARIOUS) SAN FRANCISCO CITY (STOCK) - DAY]

[EXT. HALLIWELL MANOR - DAY]



[INT. MANOR - ATTIC -- DAY]

(PIPER and PAIGE walk into the attic.  PIPER is simply angry at the attack at 
her son.  PAIGE heads for the Book of Shadows.)

PIPER:  It just pisses me off.  I can't believe they would come in the house and 
try to steal the baby!

PAIGE:  Piper, demons aren't exactly known for their moral compass.  At least 
he'll be safe with The Elders until we can figure it out.

PIPER:  But he's just a baby.  He's small and little and innocent!

PAIGE:  It's ok. He's got that invincibility thing going on.  Do you think 
that's permanent or like a baby teeth thing?

PIPER:  I have no idea, but the demons saw the force field.  They're gonna try 
and find a way around it.

PAIGE:  Unless they can get up to elder-land, he's gonna be fine.

PIPER:  Well, he can't stay up there forever!

PAIGE:  That's what we're here for.  No one is gonna steal him.  I promise you 
that.

(PIPER sighs.  LEO orbs into the attic.  He's holding his son.  PAIGE looks over 
PIPER'S shoulder surprised that he's back.  PIPER turns around.)

PIPER:  Leo?

LEO:  They wouldn't keep him.

PIPER:  What? Why?  Did you tell them what's going on?

LEO:  They want us to prove to ourselves that we can protect him like your Mom 
and Grams did for you.

(PIPER sighs.  The baby starts to cry.  LEO hands PIPER the baby.)

PIPER:  Oh, no, baby, it's ok. It's ok.  We don't need them anyway.  It's all 
right.

(PIPER sits down on the sofa.  LEO sits down next to her, concerned.)

LEO:  You ok?

PIPER:  I'm having some severe separation anxiety issues.

LEO:  We can do this, honey.

PIPER:  Ugh.

(PAIGE turns the page and finds the demon in the Book of Shadows.)

PAIGE:  Hey.  Here he is.  (reading)  The Hawker Demon.  A breed of demon known 
for hawking magical goods at the demonic market.

PIPER:  "Magical goods?"  My baby is a "magical good"?  That is just sick and 
twisted.

LEO:  The question is who would want to buy him and why?

CUT TO:



[EXT. DEMON MARKETPLACE - DAY]

(The Marketplace is bustling with activity.  Merchants sell their wares.  From 
magical weaponry, to books, spells or ingredients for potions.)



[EXT. DEMON MARKETPLACE - HAWKER'S TENT -- DAY]

(Two PARASITE DEMONS approach the Hawker's tent.  They pass by a captured gypsy 
on their way in.)

PARASITE DEMON 1:  We paid you for a baby ... not a gypsy!

HAWKER:  And I told you the little brat had a force field protecting it!

PARASITE DEMON 2:  Which is why we want it, you idiot.  The shield is what makes 
that kid a perfect battery.

PARASITE DEMON 1:  A self-sustaining, never-ending source of magical power.  We 
tap into that power, and it will return us to our former strength!

PARASITE DEMON 2:  Or would you have us stay weaklings, Hawker, doomed to feed 
on the magic of others forever?

HAWKER:  Look ... I am sorry that the witch cursed you, and I'm sorry that you 
lost all of your powers.  That's a tough break.  But it's not my fault!

CRONE: Hawker!

(CRONE makes her way toward HAWKER'S tent.  The PARASITE DEMONS step aside.)

HAWKER:  Madam.  How may I serve you today?

CRONE:  The eyes of two dozen adult brown bats and a large boar's tongue, 
please.

HAWKER:  Right away.

PARASITE DEMON 1:  We're not finished here.  She can wait her turn.

(She chuckles.)

CRONE:  Bottom feeders.  What is it that's keeping you alive today, hmm?  Feed 
on a troll for breakfast this morning?

PARASITE DEMON 2:  Back off, crone.

(The CRONE puts down the item she was looking at.  She walks up to the two 
PARASITE DEMONS and for a long moment, she stares at them carefully.  When she's 
done, she turns away from them and approaches HAWKER.)

CRONE:  I sense danger, Hawker.  The task these leeches seek you for will bring 
only death and destruction, and not to our enemies.  Turn them away.

(HAWKER gives CRONE her package.)

HAWKER:  Your order, madam.

(She pays him and leaves.)

PARASITE DEMON 1:  You're not gonna listen to that crazy old wretch, are you?

HAWKER:  The crone's wisdom is ancient and renowned.  I have already lost one 
demon on this job.  Now, you either take the gypsy or nothing.

(The two PARASITE DEMONS turn to look at the bound gypsy.)

PARASITE DEMON 2:  We'll take the gypsy to tide us over.  And we'll double the 
bounty on the infant.  

PARASITE DEMON 1:  Or maybe we'll pay that to another Hawker ... in which case 
the bounty will be on your head.

CUT TO:



[INT. BAY MIRROR - BULLPEN -- DAY]

(ELISE ROTHMAN holds a meeting in the bullpen.)

ELISE ROTHMAN:  I know it's not much of a choice, but there it is -- we find 
ways to make him happy, or we find new jobs.

PHOEBE:  Well, he can't be any tougher to please than you, right, Elise?

ELISE ROTHMAN:  Ha ha. One can only hope.  All I know is that his name is Jason 
Dean, he's new money, some kind of dot com millionaire, and he's known for his 
shaking up the companies that he buys.

KATE:  Shaking up as in layoffs?

ELISE ROTHMAN:  Honestly, Kate, you know as much as I do.

KATE:  So you don't know if you'll be employed tomorrow either.

ELISE ROTHMAN:  Look, guys, he'll be here soon, and we can get a better read 
then.  In the meantime, I suggest we all get back to work.

PHOEBE:  Work, schmirk.  I got baby pictures here!  Gather 'round, people.  
(PHOEBE starts handing out pictures of her nephew.)  You are looking at 6 
pounds, 8 ounces of pure deliciousness.

(Everyone gathers around to look at the baby pictures.  ELISE stands off to the 
side watching.)

WOMAN:  How's your sister doing?

PHOEBE:  Healthy as a horse.

WOMAN:  You think he's gonna keep those blue eyes?

PHOEBE:  He might, because his daddy has light eyes.

(A tall man leans over to ask.)

JASON DEAN:  How old is he?

PHOEBE:  Three weeks today.

JASON DEAN:  Wow. You look pretty good for a woman who had a baby three weeks 
ago.

PHOEBE:  Oh, no, I'm not his mommy.  I'm just his - (PHOEBE looks up and notices 
the tall, handsome man.)  ... auntie.  (PHOEBE smiles at him.  He smiles at 
her.)  Hi.  Have we met? 

JASON DEAN:  Jason Dean.

PHOEBE:  Oh, god!  

(ELISE steps forward.)

ELISE ROTHMAN:  I'm sorry.  Y-Y-You're Mr. Dean?

JASON DEAN:  Jason, please.

PHOEBE:  Wow, that's some weird stuff because you're ... really ... young.  
Young.  

JASON DEAN:  Yeah.  

PHOEBE:  Yeah.

(PHOEBE starts to fan herself nervously with the photos.)

JASON:  You know, it's strange.  I always pictured a newspaper bullpen as being 
a little more -- I don't know -- bustling.

(ELISE nods her head.)

PHOEBE:  Bus-bus -- bustling. Bustling.

(At this, everyone disburses and gets back to work.)

JASON DEAN:  (laughs)  Oh, hey, no!

(ELISE holds out her hand.  They shake.)

ELISE ROTHMAN:  Um ... I'm Elise Rothman.  Let me show you around.

(JASON DEAN leans toward ELISE, embarrassed that his remark cleared the 
bullpen.)

JASON DEAN:  Honestly, Elise, I didn't mean to insult your team.  I grew up 
reading comic books -- The Daily Planet ... bustled.

PHOEBE:  Yeah, but in all fairness, Superman can move faster than a speeding 
bullet, so he's got a little leg up on the bustling, you know?

(She laughs.)

JASON DEAN:  A woman who knows her superheroes.  I'm impressed.

PHOEBE:  I'm--I'm Phoebe.

(She holds out her hands and he grasps it.)

JASON DEAN:  I know. I been doing a lot of homework.  A lot of reading.  
Circulation is down, and --

(He glances down, PHOEBE still has a hold of his hand.  She looks down and lets 
his hand go.)

PHOEBE:  Oh, sorry.

JASON DEAN:  I plan to bring it up, and from what I've seen, that's gonna start 
with you.

PHOEBE:  Wow.  That's really ... sweet.  Isn't that sweet?  Did you hear that?  
I'm sorry about the little picture show, you know?

JASON DEAN:  Oh, if I had a nephew that cute, I'd show him off, too.  Best I can 
do is ... (He digs into his pocket and pulls out his wallet.  He opens it and 
shows her a ... ) ... picture of my dog.

(PHOEBE looks a the picture.  It finally dawns on her that it's his dog and she 
looks at him.  He smiles at her.  She takes the picture and looks at it.)

ELISE ROTHMAN:  Mr. Dean, if you'd like, I could give you a tour.

JASON DEAN:  Great.  Phoebe, let's talk soon.

(PHOEBE hands the wallet back to him.)

PHOEBE:  He has your eyes.

(He laughs as ELISE leads him out of the bullpen.  PHOEBE goes back to fanning 
herself.  She looks around and finally heads to her office.)

CUT TO:



[INT MANOR - SOLARIUM / SITTING ROOM -- DAY]

(PAIGE walks in through the Solarium doors and crosses into the sitting room 
where PIPER and LEO are.)

PAIGE:  Well ... the neighbors who don't already think we're crazy now 
officially do.  But the house is surrounded by apples and sage.

(PIPER sits on the sofa next to LEO, the large family tree unrolled across their 
laps.)

PIPER:  Thank you. I know you think it's a waste of time, but ...

PAIGE:  Well, if it worked, we would have done it already.

PIPER:  Every little bit helps.

PAIGE:  All right.  How's your ritual coming?

PIPER:  It's not.

PAIGE:  I thought you were gonna try to call the baby's faerie guards.

PIPER:  We were.  We are.  But in order to perform the ritual properly, we have 
to have a name for the baby first.

LEO:  So we busted out the family tree hoping to find some new ideas.

PAIGE:  Let me see.  (PAIGE walks around to look over at the family tree.)  Ok, 
right away I'm gonna say I'm against the name Herbert.

PIPER:  Yeah, we already vetoed Clarence and Milton as well.

(PAIGE looks at the bottom of the tree and notices that it's incomplete.)

PAIGE:  Not to be too self-centered, but where am I on the tree?

(PIPER looks down at the paper to check.)

LEO:  Oh, uh ... 

PIPER:  Well ... we haven't had a chance to update it lately.

PAIGE:  Oh. Right.

LEO:  Yeah.  The baby's not even on there either.

PAIGE:  Well, yeah.  That's because he doesn't have a name yet, Leo.

(LEO doesn't know what to say.  PIPER pushes the paper aside.)

PIPER:  Well, Paige, it's just a piece of paper.  It doesn't mean anything.

PAIGE:  (nods)  I know that.  Anyway ... wiccan rituals and faerie guards 
notwithstanding, I think it's time we bust out some serious ammo.  

PIPER:  As in ... 

PAIGE:  ... As in a good old-fashioned demon hunt.  I say we bypass the Hawker 
and go for the jerk that hired him to steal the baby in the first place.

(The baby starts to whimper and fuss.)

LEO:  How?

PAIGE:  I'm not so sure just yet, but I will say this.  Once we find him, we use 
him to send a message:  "If you come after this baby, you will die in the 
cruelest manner possible."

(The baby starts to cry.  PIPER stands up and picks him up.)

PIPER:  Well, I like the message.  Um ... you know, except ...

(PIPER takes the baby to the changing table.)

PAIGE:  Except ...

PIPER:  Except for the part where I have to leave my newborn child to go demon 
hunting.  I'm just -- I'm not ready.

PAIGE:  Ok, fine.  I can understand that.  I'll just, uh ... I'll take Phoebe.

LEO:  Except that she's got a really big day at work today, and we kinda need 
her money right now.

PAIGE:  I'll go by myself.

LEO:  No way. You don't even know what kind of demon we're up against.

PAIGE:  Fine. But I am the baby's godmother.  It's my job to protect him, and if 
I don't stop him, the Hawker will come back.

LEO:  (sighs)  All right.  Then let's get ready for him.

PIPER:  Exactly. We'll lay a trap for him.  Maybe we'll kidnap him and sell him 
to the highest bidder.  (PIPER takes her son to the bassinet and looks down at 
him.)  What do you think?  That's a good idea.

LEO:  We should find out who hired him and force him to take us to them.

PAIGE: No.  It sounds risky.

LEO:  Well, he has his own force field and your alarm system.
It's no more risky than you going off on your own on some wild goose chase.

PIPER:  He's right.  You should go get the crystals for the trap.

PAIGE:  (sighs)  Fine.

(PAIGE stands up and heads upstairs.  The telephone starts to ring.  PIPER 
signals LEO to answer the phone.  LEO stands up and heads for the phone.)

PIPER:  Shh, shh.

(LEO answers the phone.)

LEO:  Hello?

PIPER:  (motions to LEO)  Shh!  

(With the phone in his hand, LEO moves to the next room.)

INTERCUT WITH:

[INT. THE BAY MIRROR - PHOEBE'S OFFICE - DAY]

PHOEBE:  Don't "hello" me.  You know who I'm calling to talk to.

LEO:  Well, he's resting right now.  How'd it go with the new boss?

PHOEBE:  Oh, Jason Dean?  I want to bear his children, but that's besides the 
point.  Now let me talk --

LEO:  (smiling)  What?  You have a crush on the new boss?

PHOEBE:  I don't think I like your tone of voice, mister.  Now please let me 
talk to my nephew.  I don't want him to forget my voice.

LEO:  Well, he needs his rest.  It's ... been a little hectic around here.

PHOEBE:  Hectic? What do you mean hectic?

LEO:  Well, I ... I didn't want to worry you, but there was an attack. They were 
after the baby.

PHOEBE:  What?  Why didn't you tell me?

LEO:  I did tell you.  I--I just told you.

PHOEBE:  Ok, well, I'm coming home.

(PHOEBE grabs her bag and starts clearing her desk.)

LEO:  You don't have to.  It's under control.  There's nothing to worry about.

PHOEBE:  Leo, this is my nephew we're talking about.  You should have called me.  
I'll just tell Jason I have to work from home the rest of the day.

(PHOEBE hangs up the phone.)

(LEO looks at the phone.)

CUT TO:



[INT. THE BAY MIRROR - ELISE'S OFFICE - DAY -- CONTINUOUS]

(JASON DEAN is talking with ELISE.  PHOEBE walks in.)

JASON DEAN:  In today's market, image and content are inseparable.  We could 
publish a Pulitzer-Prize winning article, but with our puny circulation, who's 
gonna notice?

PHOEBE:  Hi. Is this a bad time?

JASON DEAN:  No. Come in, come in.  Here. Look at this woman.  Beautiful, smart, 
funny.  And she can write.  With the right exposure, she could kick Dear Abby 
down into the bush leagues.  She's a commodity.

PHOEBE:  (laughs)  Thank you, I--I think.  Now that I have your attention - 

ELISE ROTHMAN:  And we've worked hard to capitalize on her.  She has billboards.  
She's done guest spots on local radio shows.  She did that spread in 4-1-5 
magazine.

JASON DEAN:  Don't think I didn't see it.  (PHOEBE smiles embarrassed.)  What I 
was wondering was what we could do differently with regard to content.

ELISE ROTHMAN:  Content?

JASON DEAN:  I was thinking we expand her column ... have her write a series of 
features road testing her own advice, or a series on the best singles spots in 
San Francisco based on her own undercover experience.

ELISE ROTHMAN:  I like it.  Phoebe and I can work this afternoon putting some 
ideas together --

PHOEBE:  (interrupting)  No, we can't.  I'm sorry, but I have to work from home 
for the rest of the afternoon.

JASON DEAN:  Why?

PHOEBE:  Why?  Because I have a new baby--a new nephew at home, and he demands a 
lot of attention-

JASON DEAN:  But he's got parents, right?  Is there something I'm missing?

PHOEBE:  No. Look, Elise has never minded me working from home.

ELISE ROTHMAN:  Yes, but Phoebe, we're talking about expanding your column.  I 
should think you'd want a hand in what that's gonna look like.

PHOEBE:  Well, of course I do, Elise, but --

JASON DEAN:  Are we not paying you enough?

PHOEBE:  No, that's not it!

JASON DEAN:  Ok, sit down with Elise, come up with some new ideas, and while 
you're at it, discuss what you think your new salary should be.  We'll meet 
again late this afternoon.

(JASON'S cell phone rings.  He answers it.)

JASON DEAN:  (to phone)  Yeah?  (pause)  Great.

(He leaves the office.  Camera holds on PHOEBE looking at ELISE.)

CUT TO:



[INT MANOR - SITTING ROOM - DAY]

(The baby waves his arms in the bassinet.  PIPER and LEO watch over him.)

PIPER:  Why would somebody want to hurt something so innocent?

(LEO points to PAIGE who is asleep on the couch.)

[INT. MANOR - SOLARIUM - DAY -- CONTINUOUS]

(PIPER and LEO walk out into the Solarium.)

PIPER:  Poor Paige.  She's getting all the hassles of parenthood with none of 
the rewards.

LEO:  I think a smile from her nephew is all she'll ever want.  It's gonna be 
ok, Piper.

PIPER:  How?

LEO:  Because babies are resilient, and ours has a little extra of that.

PIPER:  But even so, it can't be good for him.  Even if he can handle the 
demons, he must sense the tension, which means at the very best we end up with a 
neurotic infant.

LEO:  Look on the bright side--growing up with your sisters, he was bound to be 
neurotic anyway.

(LEO laughs gently.)

PIPER:  (rolls her eyes)  Pfft!

(PAIGE comes flying out of the sitting room and into the Solarium.  She hits the 
chair.  LEO and PIPER go to see what's happening.  The baby alarms go off.)

(In the sitting room, there are two demons, The Hawker and another Demon, who 
has a beam on the force field around the bassinet, pushing it up and out toward 
the window.)

(PIPER sees this and her instincts kick in.)

PIPER: No!

(PIPER throws herself at the bassinet and force field knocking it out of the 
Demon's beam.  They both fall to the floor.)

(LEO tackles both Demons, knocking them to the floor.  PAIGE runs into the 
room.)

PAIGE:  Leo!

(LEO gets up.  PAIGE puts the crystal down on the ground creating a cage around 
the two demons.  They both disintegrate.)

(The demon alarms stop and the baby's cries are heard.  LEO hurries over to the 
baby.)

PAIGE:  (to herself)  I guess I overcharged it.

(PAIGE picks up the demon's athame from the floor.)

(The baby cries.  PIPER sits up and checks on her son.)

PIPER:  I got ya, bub.  You're all right.

(LEO rushes into the room and checks in on the baby.)

LEO:  How's my little buddy doing, huh?

PIPER:  (looks up at LEO)  I think we need a little bit of healing here.

LEO:  He looks fine to me.

PIPER:  Not him. Me.

(PIPER looks down at her bloodied and broken leg... broken so badly, the bone is 
sticking out.   She falls back to the floor, unconscious.)

(Brow furrowed at the damage to PIPER'S leg, LEO leans in.)

LEO:  Oh ...

FADE TO BLACK.

(COMMERCIAL SET)



FADE IN.

[EXT. MANOR - DAY]



[INT. MANOR - SITTING ROOM -- DAY]

(LEO is poised over PIPER'S leg ready to heal her.  He looks up at PAIGE.)

LEO: All right, now ... easy.  Easy.  Watch her head.  Make sure you hold her 
hands.  We don't want her blowing anything up.

(PAIGE grabs ahold of PIPER'S hands.  PIPER is still unconscious, her head in 
PAIGE'S lap.)

PAIGE:  Just do it.

(LEO heals PIPER'S broken leg.  PIPER immediate gets up.)

PIPER:  (screams)  Aah!  Where's the baby?

LEO:  It's all right, honey.  He's ok.

PIPER:  They knew about the force field.  They almost flew him out of the 
window!

LEO:  Yeah, but they didn't, and right now our concern is about you.

PIPER:  Me? Why? I'm healed.

LEO:  Yes, but the fact is that you needed to be healed.  That's what I'm 
talking about.

PIPER:  Yeah. I guess I'm not so invincible anymore, huh?

PAIGE:  Well, it makes sense, since you got the power from him, and he's not 
inside you anymore.

LEO:  I was just hoping he'd leave a little bit behind for mama.

(PAIGE studies the athame.)

PIPER:  Well, the theory did occur to me, but I haven't had a chance to test it 
out.

LEO:  Look, this is serious, Piper.  You need to learn how to be careful again 
now that you're vulnerable.

PIPER:  I don't have the luxury of being careful now that half of Demonville is 
after our child.

PAIGE:  Uhm ... What do you think about using the athame to scry for the demonic 
market?  It makes sense that the Hawker demon got it there.

PIPER:  Yeah ... 

PAIGE:  We can disguise ourselves as demons, infiltrate the market, and pretend 
that we know how to get The Charmed Ones' baby.

PIPER:  It's a smart plan.  Then we could find out what sicko is in the market 
to buy him.

PAIGE:  Right. Then we vanquish them, everyone they've ever met, and proceed 
with our original demon-killing message-sending plan.

PIPER:  It's a very wordy, very good plan.

LEO:  Oh, it's a good idea to send the mother of my child into the hornets' nest 
because you overcharged the trap?

PAIGE:  Oh, gee, one little mistake, man.

PIPER:  It's ok. She's right.  We can go.

PAIGE:  Right.

(PAIGE stands up.  PIPER and LEO don't move.  PIPER looks at her baby in the 
bassinet.  LEO hesitates.  PAIGE stops when she realizes that neither one has 
moved.)

PAIGE:  You're sure you're ok to do this?

(PIPER can't take her eyes off of her son.  She hesitates answering and shakes 
her head.  She looks up at PAIGE and makes a decision.)

PIPER:  No. I can't go.

PAIGE:  (softly)  Ok. I'll just go check The Book of Shadows, see if I missed 
anything.  He'll be ok.

(PAIGE leaves the room.)

PIPER:  (quietly)  I think it's time we call Phoebe.

LEO:  I called her.  She said she was on her way home.  (PIPER silently looks at 
LEO, her eyes filling with unshed tears.  LEO doesn't hesitate.)  I'll call her 
again.

(LEO stands up.  PIPER looks down at her baby.)

PIPER:  You're ok, little guy.  We're not gonna let anybody steal you.

CUT TO:



[INT. MANOR - PIPER'S BEDROOM - DAY]

(PAIGE quietly walks into PIPER'S bedroom.  She heads straight for the bassinet 
and takes the blue baby blanket with the triquetra symbol on it.)

(She leaves the room.)

CUT TO:



[EXT. WOODS -- DAY]

(Out from the trees, PAIGE in a tight blue dress and white-blonde wig walks out.  
In her hands, she holds the blue blanket.)

PAIGE:  (quietly to herself)  It's ok, Paige.  It's ok.  You fought fairy tales 
earlier this year.  You can do this.  You can do this.  You can do this. You --

(A blue powerball hits her square on the chest.  She falls down flat on her 
face.)

(In front of her, two DEMON GUARDS materialize out of two trees.)

DEMON GUARD 1:  Lost, little girl?

(PAIGE stands up.)

PAIGE:  You have a really messed up idea of customer service.

DEMON GUARD 2:  What?

PAIGE:  I am a dissatisfied customer.  I bought this athame at the market ... 
It's supposed to flame.  It doesn't.  I paid a pretty penny for it, too.  And 
for what?  It almost got me killed trying to steal The Charmed Ones' baby.  You 
wanna know what I got for my efforts?  A nice little blanket.  Mm.  Sweet.  Oh, 
and the Hawker who hired me?  He got eighty-sixed, so I didn't even get a pay 
day.

DEMON GUARD 1:  Who are you?

PAIGE:  I told you.  I'm a dissatisfied customer.

(PAIGE stabs DEMON GUARD 2 in the abdomen.  He disintegrates into black dust.  
She holds the athame up to show DEMON GUARD 1.)

PAIGE:  See? No flame.

(DEMON GUARD 1 waves his arm and the shrubbery between the two tress disappears 
to reveal the demon market it conceals.)

(PAIGE takes a breath and walks inside.  The DEMON GUARD 1 waves his arm and the 
entrance to the demon market vanishes.)

CUT TO:



[EXT. DEMONIC MARKETPLACE -- DAY]

(PAIGE continues through the demonic marketplace.  The camera pulls up and pans 
downward to show just how large the marketplace is.)

CUT TO:



[INT. THE BAY MIRROR - ELISE'S OFFICE -- DAY]

(PHOEBE tries to get through the meeting with ELISE and JASON DEAN as soon as 
possible.)

PHOEBE:  So we thought I could hit a couple of clubs around town and try out the 
pick-up lines that I suggested in my column.

ELISE ROTHMAN:  Then she'll report back on how they work off the page and in the 
world.

JASON DEAN:  I love it.  It's sexy as hell.

PHOEBE:  Ok, great.  So ... why don't I go home ...

(JASON'S cell phone rings.  PHOEBE stands up.)
PHOEBE:  ... and try to work on ... 

(He answers it.)

JASON DEAN:  Yeah?  (pause)  Uh-huh.  (beat)  No. No, definitely not.  (PHOEBE 
sits back down.)  Great.  

(He hangs up.  PHOEBE is preoccupied and wants to go home.  ELISE doesn't say 
anything.  JASON watches PHOEBE.  )  

JASON DEAN:  Are you ok?

PHOEBE:  (smiling)  Yeah. I'm fine.  I just--I have a little blood sugar issue.  
It's nothing serious, but I have to eat.

JASON DEAN:  Say no more.  You like Chinese?  Food, not people.

PHOEBE:  (serious)  I really need to get home.

JASON DEAN:  Elise, could you excuse us for a moment?

ELISE ROTHMAN:  Sure.  I'll just, um ... be over here.

(ELISE stands and walks out of the office.  As she passes PHOEBE, she mouths 
words to her.  The door closes behind her leaving PHOEBE alone in the office 
with JASON DEAN.)

JASON DEAN:  Is this about your sister's baby again?

PHOEBE:  Yes. It is, actually, I need to go spend some time with him.

JASON DEAN:  With your sister's baby.

PHOEBE:  Yes. Look, you may not understand, but that baby needs me right now.

JASON DEAN:  Is your sister a single parent?

PHOEBE:  No.

JASON DEAN:  Look ... Phoebe, I think it's really wonderful that you love your 
nephew this much ... I really do.  But you have a job.

PHOEBE:  Yeah, and I think I do it pretty well.

JASON DEAN:  Yes, you do.  Until recently.

PHOEBE:  Excuse me?

JASON DEAN:  I spent some of the afternoon going over your columns from the last 
few weeks, and they've become very ...

(He pauses.  JASON sits down in ELISE'S chair.)

PHOEBE:  What?

JASON DEAN:  Baby-centric.  They're all about ... diapers and mother's milk.  
They don't even read like you.  They've lost your edge.  You're sexy.

PHOEBE:  Ok, well, any writer, any good writer, uses their life experiences in 
their work.

JASON DEAN:  That's true.  But if all you've got to inform your work is someone 
else' maybe you need to re-evaluate your priorities.

(A light knock sounds on the door before it opens.  The ASSISTANT pokes her head 
inside.)

ASSISTANT:  I'm sorry, Mr. Dean.  (to PHOEBE) ... but your brother-in-law is on 
the phone, and it's the third time he's called.

PHOEBE:  What?  Why didn't you tell me?

(Without another word to JASON DEAN, PHOEBE leaves the office.)

CUT TO:



[INT. MANOR - SITTING ROOM -- DAY]

(LEO and PHOEBE orb in.)

PHOEBE:  I don't understand.  Why didn't you just orb for me when they wouldn't 
put you through?

LEO:  Because I didn't want to leave the house unless it was absolutely 
necessary.

(PHOEBE puts her jacket and bag down on the sofa.)

PHOEBE:  Oh, right.  (PHOEBE looks into the bassinet to see her baby nephew 
sleeping peacefully.)  Ok, so there was another kidnap attempt?

(PHOEBE reaches out to pick up her nephew.  PIPER gently urges PHOEBE to quiet 
down and to move to the side of the room.)

PIPER:  Yes.  Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh.

PHOEBE:  I can't believe they didn't put you through!

LEO:  They said you were in an important meeting, and the boss said you 
shouldn't be disturbed.

PHOEBE:  Unbelievable.  And he says I have my priorities mixed up?

LEO:  Who?

PHOEBE:  Jason Dean.

LEO:  Jason ... (LEO turns to look at PIPER.) ... Jason Halli-- ??

PHOEBE:  Don't even think about it, mister.

(The baby starts to wake up.  He stretches his arms up and starts to fuss.)

LEO:  Please tell me you didn't get fired.

PHOEBE:  N-no, I didn -- I don't think I did.  (The baby alarms start going 
off.)  What the hell is that?

LEO:  The baby alarm.
PIPER:  The baby alarm.  

PHOEBE:  What?!

(Before PIPER can get to the baby, PHOEBE rushes over to pick him up.)

PHOEBE:  (to the baby)  Ok.  I know.  (The baby alarms stop.)  It's so much 
excitement!  What was that alerting us to, exactly?

(LEO starts to look around the area.)

LEO:  Demons. There's supposed to be demons in the house.

PHOEBE:  Look at that!  He's not even crying.  You are so brave.  You're like a 
little brave soldier.

(LEO walks back into the room.)

LEO:  Maybe the alarm is faulty.

PIPER:  Paige would know.

PHOEBE:  Where is Paige?

(PIPER realizes that PAIGE isn't there.)

CUT TO:



[INT. MANOR - ATTIC - DAY -- CONTINUOUS]

(PIPER, carrying the baby, LEO and PHOEBE walk into the attic.  They look for 
PAIGE.  It's obvious that she's not there.)

LEO:  Paige?

PIPER:  Oh, my god.  She's not here.

(PIPER puts the baby in the attic bassinet and starts looking around.)

PHOEBE:  Ok, why is that an, "oh, my god"?

LEO:  The scrying tools are out.  

PIPER:  The hand grenade potion is gone.

PHOEBE:  Will someone please tell me what's going on here?  (PIPER picks up a 
piece of paper left on the table.)  What is that, a spell?

PIPER:  No, it's a note.  "Gone to market.  Back soon."

PHOEBE:  Ok, well, that's good news, right?  (PIPER looks at LEO.)  She went to 
the market.

(PIPER sighs.)

CUT TO:



[EXT. DEMONIC MARKETPLACE -- DAY]

(The Marketplace is bustling.  PAIGE, escorted on the arm of a BRUTISH DEMON, 
gets a tour from him.  They pass a DEMONIC SALESWOMAN selling a powerball.)

DEMONIC SALESWOMAN:  Come on, guys, this is top of the line, the power to throw 
fireballs twenty yards!  Now let's hear a serious offer!

BRUTISH DEMON:  (o.s.)  If you need any powers, there's where to go.

PAIGE:  (to the DEMON)  Ha ha ha!  You're such a great tour guide.

(They pass by a DEMONIC SALESMAN who looks a little nerdy.)

DEMONIC SALESMAN:  Looking for that little something extra?  You didn't think I 
was a demon to just stand on the sidelines. Now ... watch and see what my permu-
tonic can do for you.  

(He drinks the tonic and the Demonic Salesman turns into a muscular, body-
builder type Demon.)

(PAIGE and the BRUTISH DEMON keep walking.  They pass by a WOMAN DEMON holding a 
fireball and talking with someone.  The BRUTISH DEMON indicates ahead.)

BRUTISH DEMON:  I think up there's the guys you're lookin' for.  The parasites.

PAIGE:  Oh, parasites.  Should I be frightened?

BRUTISH DEMON:  Nah. They were bad-ass once, but some witch cursed 'em, took 
away their powers.  Pitiful little bastards.  Even a girl like you could take 
'em.  

PAIGE:  Oh, really?  A girl like me?  Then I might just have to.  Well, thank 
you for the tour.  I suppose you'll be wanting your ... payment now.

BRUTISH DEMON:  Mm-hmm. You know I will.

(He lunges forward to grope her.  PAIGE holds out her hand and calls for a 
fireball.)

PAIGE:  Fireball!

(The fireball being held by the DEMON WOMAN they passed by earlier orbs into 
PAIGE'S hand.  She throws it at the BRUTISH DEMON, vanquishing him where he 
stands.)

(The DEMON WOMAN looks up at PAIGE in protest.)

DEMON WOMAN:  Hey!

PAIGE:  Sorry. He was getting a little grabby.

(The DEMON WOMAN conjures up another fireball.  PAIGE heads for the PARASITE 
DEMONS' tent.)

CUT TO:



[INT. PARASITE DEMONS' TENT - DAY -- CONTINUOUS]

(Inside the tent, the two PARASITE DEMONS leech off energy from the gypsy woman 
they bought from the Hawker's stand.  PAIGE walks in.)

PAIGE:  Excuse me.  Anyone here interested in a charmed One's offspring.

PARASITE DEMON 1:  Who are you?

PAIGE:  I'm the reason you're not gonna need that food anymore, not after you 
hear what I have to say.

PARASITE DEMON 2:  The food ... is dead.  (They look at the gypsy on the table.)  
You were saying?

PAIGE:  Just that The Hawker who hired me to grab the baby screwed up the job 
and got himself dead.  He didn't say who hired him, but I heard it was you.

PARASITE DEMON 2:  So what if it was?

PAIGE:  Don't get nervous.  I'm just here for the bounty.  The offer still 
stands, right?

PARASITE DEMON 1:  First ... tell us why you're still alive.

PAIGE:  I'll take that as a yes.

(PAIGE takes out the grenade potion she concealed behind the baby blanket and 
throws it at the PARASITE DEMONS.  The vial explodes.  The two DEMONS leech off 
the power of the blast from the potion.  They then turn and start leeching off 
power from PAIGE.)

(PAIGE'S disguise is leeched right off of her along with a significant amount of 
her own strength.  Her blonde-hair is gone revealing a Charmed One.)

(PAIGE falls to the floor weak.)

(The two PARASITE DEMONS step up and start leeching off PAIGE'S power.)

FADE TO BLACK.

(COMMERCIAL SET)



FADE IN.

[EXT. MANOR - NIGHT]



[INT. MANOR - ATTIC -- NIGHT]

PIPER:  Come on, people.  Talk to me.

(PHOEBE scrys for the Demonic Marketplace.  The crystal stops circling the map 
and stops.)

PHOEBE:  Bingo. We have a location of the market.

PIPER:  Yes! Anything on Paige?

LEO:  I can't sense her at all.  But that doesn't mean we should panic.  Her 
signal might be blocked by the magic of the marketplace.

PHOEBE:  Right, there's no reason to panic. Our sister went alone to Demonville.  
She has no idea what or who she's up against, so there's no reason to panic, 
right?!

PIPER:  Phoebe, it was my fault.  I should have gone with her.

PHOEBE:  I would have gone with her had she called me.

PIPER:  Well, I told her not to bother you 'cause you were trying to impress 
your new boss.

PHOEBE:  I was not trying to impress my new boss, thank you.

LEO:  You weren't?  But, this morning ...

PHOEBE:  (caught, she sighs)  Well, I -- ok, maybe this morning I was trying to 
impress him, but I'm not, so can we talk about anything but Jason Dean, please?  
Thank you very much.

PIPER:  Yeah, let's talk about how we're gonna find Paige.

PHOEBE:  Oh. Well, we're gonna write a spell that's gonna carry us to the 
market.  Can I have some paper?

(PIPER grabs the note PAIGE wrote from the table and hands it to PHOEBE.  PHOEBE 
takes the note and immediately has a premonition.  She gasps.)

(Quick Premonition of:  The two PARASITE DEMONS suck the power and magic out 
from PAIGE as she lies on the table.  End of Quick Premonition.  Resume to 
present.)

PIPER:  Are you ok?

PHOEBE:  No. It's time to panic.

(The demon alarms go off.  PIPER turns around to check on the baby.)

PIPER:  Oh, my god!

CUT TO:



[INT. PARASITE DEMONS' TENT -- NIGHT]

(PAIGE is lying bound and weak on the table, the two PARASITE DEMONS stand 
around her deciding her fate ... and the fate of her nephew.)

PARASITE DEMON 2:  I say we suck her dry.  Nice and slow.

PARASITE DEMON 1:  Tempting, but ... 

PARASITE DEMON 2:  But what?  You forget it was one of her kind who cursed us to 
this life?

PAIGE:  (weakly)  Please ... 

PARASITE DEMON 1:  Say we kill her, get revenge on yet another witch.  Then 
what?  We're still parasites.  Nothing will have changed.

PARASITE DEMON 2:  She'll be dead.  That's change.

PARASITE DEMON 1:  We'll still be bound to this trivial existence.  Think about 
it.  She's a Charmed One.  Her sisters will sense her, if we keep her alive ... 
and then they will come for her.

PARASITE DEMON 2:  And when they do ... the infant will be left vulnerable.

PAIGE:  No ...

CUT TO:



[INT. MANOR - ATTIC -- NIGHT]

(LEO walks back into the attic.  PIPER'S carrying the baby.)

PIPER:  No ... Anything?

LEO:  Unless they're invisible, there's no demons in this house.

PIPER:  Then why does the alarm keep going off?

LEO:  We'd have to ask Paige.

PHOEBE:  We'd better hurry, because from what I saw, she doesn't have a lot of 
time.

(PIPER moves to stand in front of PHOEBE.)

PIPER:  You want me to leave my baby when the alarm designed to sense evil is 
going off every ten minutes?

PHOEBE:  Believe me, I don't want to leave the baby either, but the alarm is 
broken.  There is no evil in this house.

PIPER:  But we've gone up against invisible demons before, you know, demons that 
morph into lamps, lamps that morph into demons, demons in the walls.

PHOEBE:  But don't you think if they were here they'd be attacking the baby by 
now?

(The baby smiles and gurgles.  They both stop and look at the baby.)

PHOEBE:  Oh, look at him.  He's smiling!  Oh, you are so brave.

LEO:  He's smiling?  

PHOEBE:  Either that or he has gas.

(LEO thinks about it and something occurs to him.)

LEO:  Piper, put him down.

PIPER:  What?

LEO:  He was crying when the demon attacked.

PIPER:  So ... 

LEO:  So just put him down a minute and come over here.  You, too, Phoebe.

PHOEBE:  Why?

LEO:  Trust me.

PIPER:  Ok ...

(PIPER puts the baby in the bassinet.  She and PHOEBE go to stand next to LEO 
some distance away from the baby and out of the baby's immediate view.)

PIPER:  What are we doing?!

LEO:  Just ... wait.

PHOEBE:  For what?

(The baby waves his arms and whines.  The demon alarms go off.  PIPER and PHOEBE 
immediately run to the baby.)

LEO:  (looks around)  That's what.

(PIPER and PHOEBE stop moving.)

PHOEBE:  I don't get it.

LEO:  He's doing it.  He's using his powers to set off the alarm.

(PIPER looks down at her son.  He looks back up at her and holds his arms out.)

PIPER:  Because he figured out when it goes off that we'll come running.

PHOEBE:  (smiling)  He's just trying to get attention.  He's a genius!  Oh, 
you're a genius!

LEO:  That's my boy, using your powers.

PIPER:  Are you trying to give mommy a heart attack?  Is that what you're trying 
to do?

LEO:  So ... I guess it's safe to say you can go help Paige.

(PIPER straightens up.)

PIPER:  Right.

PHOEBE:  Yeah.  Ok.

PIPER:  Grab some potions, 'cause if I'm going to that market and leaving him 
here, we're not taking no prisoners.

(PHOEBE picks up the potion vials from the table and turns around.)

(LEO walks up behind PIPER and puts his hands on her shoulders.)

LEO:  (softly)  Just ... be careful.

PIPER:  I will.

LEO:  You're not invincible anymore.

PIPER:  I know.  It's just ... so hard to leave.  

(PIPER'S voice breaks.  She looks down at her son in the bassinet and watches as 
PHOEBE gives the entire bassinet a hug.)

PIPER:  It's ... so hard to make Phoebe leave.

LEO:  Well, just make sure ... you come back.

PIPER:  You take care of him.  I mean, one hair out of place on the head, you 
and me--issues.

LEO:  I will.  At the first sign of trouble, I will orb him out.

PIPER:  Ok.  Phoebe.  (PHOEBE lets go of the bassinet and straightens.)  Here we 
go.  Here we go.

CUT TO:



[EXT. WOODS -- NIGHT]

(PHOEBE and PIPER walk through the grotto and toward the entrance to the Demonic 
Marketplace.  As they get closer, a blue powerball hurls toward them.  They 
easily dodge it and it passes both of them by and blows up behind them.)

(PIPER looks around for the source of the powerball.  DEMON GUARD 1 walks out of 
the tree.)

PHOEBE:  Where's the market?

DEMON GUARD 1:  Who are you?

PIPER:  I'm The Mother.

(PIPER doesn't wait for an answer.  She waves her hands and blasts the DEMON 
GUARD out of her way.  The DEMON GUARD goes flying backward and crashes into the 
barrier between the two trees hiding the Demonic Marketplace from view.  The 
barrier gives way revealing the entrance to the Demonic Marketplace to the two 
witches.)

(PIPER grabs PHOEBE'S hand and they run into the Marketplace.)

CUT TO:



[EXT. DEMONIC MARKETPLACE - NIGHT -- CONTINUOUS]

(With dozens of Demons in front of them, PIPER yells angrily into the crowd.)

PIPER:  Which one of you Dirtbags put the Bounty on my baby?!

(In the crowd concealed in darkness, the CRONE steps forward a little into the 
light as she watches PIPER carefully.)

(A Demon standing to the side raises his hand and hurls a stream of fire at 
PIPER.  PIPER raises her hands and the fire fizzles out into nothing.  She waves 
her hands again and the Demon disintegrates completely, vanishing in a puff of 
fire and smoke.)

CUT TO:



[INT. PARASITE DEMONS' TENT - NIGHT -- CONTINUOUS]

(Outside, the commotion continues.  Demons scream and explosions are heard.  
PAIGE is still weak on the table inside the tent.)

(The PARASITE DEMONS walk to the window and look outside.  Demons are running 
and screaming everywhere, the skies light up and glow from the explosions and 
fire.)

(And in the middle of the main marketplace road, PIPER and PHOEBE rapidly make 
their way toward them.)

PARASITE DEMON 1:  They're here.

(Outside, PHOEBE and PIPER head straight for them.)

PARASITE DEMON 2:  It's baby time.

(They both disappear.)

CUT TO:



[INT. MANOR - SITTING ROOM -- NIGHT]

(LEO is in the sitting room reading a book and guarding his son.  The demon 
alarms go off, lights flashing.  Thinking that it's his son who set off the 
alarms, LEO gets up and looks in on the bassinet.)

LEO:  (soothing)  It's ok, buddy.  Mommy'll be home soon.

(The two PARASITE DEMONS appear behind LEO.  The baby starts to cry.  Really 
cry.)

(They raise their outstretched hands over LEO and start to suck the power and 
magic out of him.)

(Surprised, LEO struggles and gasps.  They leech out LEO'S magical powers and he 
falls to the floor.)

(The baby continues to cry.)

FADE TO BLACK.

(COMMERCIAL SET)



FADE IN.

[INT. PARASITE DEMONS' PLACE -- NIGHT]

(PIPER and PHOEBE walk into the place toward PAIGE who is bound on the table.  
They untie her.)

PHOEBE:  Where are they?

PAIGE:  Piper ...

PIPER:  I know you are very happy to see us.

PAIGE:  The baby.

PHOEBE:  He's fine.  He's with Leo.

PAIGE:  The parasites, they'll absorb Leo's power.

PIPER:  What?!

PHOEBE:  Can you orb?

PAIGE:  No.  (They sit PAIGE up and between PIPER and PHOEBE, they half carry 
her out of the place.)  No, they took my powers away.

PHOEBE:  We've got to get to the other side of the gate.

(PIPER sees the blue baby blanket and grabs it.)

PIPER:  That is mine!

[EXT. DEMONIC MARKETPLACE - ROADWAY - NIGHT -- CONTINUOUS]

(As they leave, PIPER drops the blanket.  PAIGE notices.)

PAIGE:  (weakly)  The blanket!

PHOEBE: Leave it.

(Without a backward glance at the blanket, they keep going.  The CRONE walks 
over to the blanket and picks it up.)

CUT TO:



[INT. MANOR - SITTING ROOM - NIGHT]

(Inside the manor, the two PARASITE DEMONS try to suck the power out of the blue 
shield the baby has around the bassinet.  The baby cries.  The shield waivers.)

PARASITE DEMON 1:  Do you feel the power?

PARASITE DEMON 2:  Oh, it's fantastic.  But how will we get him out of here?

PARASITE DEMON 1:  Keep draining the magic.  (LEO'S eyes flutter open and he 
catches the last part of what he says.)  The force field will falter, and then 
he'll be ours.

(Using whatever strength he has left to protect his son, LEO gets up and grabs a 
lamp on the nearby table.  With all his might, he crashes it against the two 
demons.)

(LEO falls weakly into the force shield.  The baby continues to cry.)

(The two PARASITE DEMONS resume leeching the power from the force shield ... and 
LEO.)

CUT TO:



[INT. MANOR - ATTIC -- NIGHT]

(PAIGE orbs PHOEBE and PIPER into the attic.  They gently set her down on the 
sofa.)

PAIGE:  Go!  Don't let them put their hands on you.

(PHOEBE and PIPER look at PAIGE for a moment, then leave the attic.)

CUT TO:



[INT. MANOR - SITTING ROOM - NIGHT -- CONTINUOUS]

(The baby cries.)

(Still caught in the force shield, LEO turns around and puts himself between the 
PARASITE DEMONS and his son.  The force shield thins out and dangerously weakens 
into almost nothing.)

LEO:  (anguished)  No!

(PIPER and PHOEBE come down the stairs and see the two PARASITE DEMONS over LEO 
and the bassinet.  PIPER waves her hands and blasts PARASITE DEMON 1 into black 
dust.  The second PARASITE DEMON turns around and sees PIPER, he quickly 
shimmers out of the manor.)

PIPER:  He got away.

PHOEBE:  It's ok. Let him go.

(The baby's blue force shield disappears.  LEO turns to check on his son.)

PIPER:  (to PHOEBE)  I said, 'No Prisoners'.  (to LEO)  Are you okay?

LEO:  Yeah.

(LEO turns to look at PIPER.  Their eyes meet.)

PIPER:  We're going back.

CUT TO:



[INT. PARASITE DEMONS' TENT -- NIGHT]

(Standing inside the empty room, clutching the blue baby blanket in her hand, 
the CRONE stares angrily out the window at the damage to the once bustling 
marketplace.)

(PARASITE DEMON 2 shimmers into the room.)

CRONE:  (accusing)  You did this to us.  I warned you.

PARASITE DEMON 2:  The witches did this, not me.

(The CRONE turns around and takes a step toward the DEMON.)

CRONE:  The witches are nothing compared to - (She stops as she "sees" 
something.  The DEMON notices.  She continues.)  This child is more powerful 
beyond your understanding.  What I have foreseen ... is not to be ignored.

PARASITE DEMON 2:  What?  What did you see?  What is he?

CRONE:  He is our end.  We'll have nothing more to do with this ... being.

PARASITE DEMON 2:  That's easy for you to say.  You have powers of your own.

(PIPER and PHOEBE walk in through the doorway.)

CRONE:  And I enjoy using them.

(The CRONE raises her hands and surrounds the PARASITE DEMON in a whirlwind of 
sand.  The whirlwind-tornado gets smaller and squeezes whatever life there is 
out of the last PARASITE DEMON.  He cries out in pain and explodes into 
nothing.)

PIPER:  Impressive.

(The CRONE turns to look at PIPER and PHOEBE.)

CRONE:  Your sister's powers have been restored.

PHOEBE:  Who are you?

CRONE:  I represent those in power.  Rest assured, a law will be passed 
forbidding any further attempts on your child.

PIPER:  Why?  What do you stand to gain?

CRONE:  Nothing.  You have proven ... that the costs of a war will far outweigh 
the benefits.  Consider this ... (She gives PIPER back the blue baby blanket.) 
... our ... white flag.  Now I suggest you rest well and preserve your energies.  
From what I've foreseen ... you're going to need them.

(She vanishes from the room.)

PHOEBE:  Way to send a message, warrior mom!

(PHOEBE puts an arm around PIPER.)

PIPER:  I don't know about that.

PHOEBE:  You didn't believe her?

PIPER:  Well, partially, but I think this had more to do with him than anything 
we did.

PHOEBE:  What do you think she foresaw?

PIPER:  I wish I knew.

(PIPER and PHOEBE walk out of the room.)

CUT TO:



[EXT. MANOR - NIGHT]



[INT. MANOR -- NIGHT]

(BABY'S POV)

(AUNT PHOEBE sticks her head close to the baby and smiles.)

PHOEBE:  Oh, I could eat you!  Yes, I could!   Yes, I could!

PIPER:  Phoeb, after the demonic parasites just actually did kinda wanna eat 
him.  Not so cute.

(PHOEBE looks at PIPER, then turns her attention back to the baby.)

PHOEBE:  Gotcha.  Ooh, I could smush you!  Ooh, I could smush your little face!  
Ooh, la la la la!

PIPER:  Much better.

PAIGE:  Is that his new name, Smush Face Halliwell?

LEO:  It's about as good as everything else we've come up with.

PHOEBE:  No new ideas, huh?

PIPER:  Actually - 

LEO:  (interrupting)  No.  We've been so busy with the alarm and the demon-
fighting and the sister-saving ...

PAIGE:  (murmurs)  I'm sorry.

PIPER:  Oh, don't be sorry, Paige.  You were brave, and you inspired me to fight 
and you made the world a safer place for our baby.  Which is why I would like to 
give the baby the middle name of Matthew in honor of his super-protective Aunt 
Paige.

PHOEBE:  I think that's a great idea.

PIPER:  (to LEO)  What do you think?

LEO:  Yeah.

PAIGE:  (honored)  Thanks.

PIPER:  And I also have an idea for his first name.  Wyatt, in honor of his very 
protective daddy.

LEO:  (smiles)  Really?  It doesn't start with a "P."

PIPER:  Eh, so we break the tradition.

(PHOEBE picks up Wyatt Matthew.)

PHOEBE:  Happy baby!  Happy baby!  Tch. Why don't we ask him?  (PHOEBE looks at 
PIPER.)  That's probably your job.

(PIPER chuckles as PHOEBE hands Wyatt Matthew to her.  PIPER looks at her son.)

PIPER:  Wyatt Matthew Halliwell, is that your name?  What do you think?  It's a 
good one.

CUT TO:



[EXT. (VARIOUS) SAN FRANCISCO CITY (STOCK) - NIGHT]



[INT. THE BAY MIRROR - ELISE'S OFFICE -- NIGHT]

(PHOEBE walks to ELISE'S office where JASON DEAN is busy working.  She knocks 
lightly on the door before entering.  He raises his head from his work and sees 
her standing there.)

PHOEBE:  I thought you'd still be here.

JASON DEAN:  Yeah.  Well, there's a lot to do.

(He goes back to his work.  PHOEBE walks into the office.)

PHOEBE:  Uh ... I just came by to ... say that ... I'm really sorry.

(He looks up.)

JASON DEAN:  Huh.  I didn't figure you for the type to apologize easily.

PHOEBE:  Yeah. I'm not.  I only apologize when I'm wrong.  Ok, I wasn't entirely 
wrong.  There was an emergency at home, and I did need to leave, and in the 
future if you're gonna hold my calls, I hope you tell me.

JASON DEAN:  This is an apology?

PHOEBE:  Yes. Because about the other stuff ... you were right.  I got 
overwhelmed by the baby and I lost my voice, my perspective.

JASON DEAN:  That's really --

PHOEBE:  (interrupting)  It's just that since we were kids, we always shared 
everything equally, so when the baby came, I just thought it should be the same 
way.  Which is ridiculous, 'cause I'm not his mom, I'm his aunt, and it actually 
works out great for me, 'cause moms have to parent, and I just get to spoil.

JASON DEAN:  Well, that's understandable--

PHOEBE:  (interrupting)  And I know you're really busy and you don't need to be 
listening to some advice columnist's psycho-babble, but ... um ... if I still 
have a job ... I promise you'll see all the changes you're looking for in my 
column first thing in the morning.

JASON DEAN:  Great.  Can I talk now?

PHOEBE:  Oh.  Yeah.

(He leans back in his chair.)

JASON DEAN:  I knew less about my last girlfriend's family than I've learned 
about yours in the last five minutes.

PHOEBE:  Oh, really?

JASON DEAN:  (interrupting)  Still talking.

PHOEBE:  Sorry.

JASON DEAN:  (interrupting)  I am busy.  But making this paper work is important 
to me, and if that means listening to an advice columnist's late-night psycho-
babble, then that's what I'm willing to do.

PHOEBE:  That's --

JASON DEAN:  (interrupting)  Still talking.

PHOEBE:  (smiles)  Right.

JASON DEAN:  (interrupting)  This paper can't afford to lose you, Phoebe.  
You're too valuable, too talented.  And if you can admit when you were wrong, 
then so can I.

PHOEBE:  (hopeful)  So ... 

JASON DEAN:  So?  In the future ... if I have to hold your calls, I'll let you 
know.

PHOEBE:  Thank you.

JASON DEAN:  You're welcome.  Done talking.

(PHOEBE smiles and giggles.  She nods.  JASON DEAN smiles at her nervousness.  
PHOEBE giggles again.)

PHOEBE:  Ok.  (she laughs)  I'll just ...

(PHOEBE turns to leave the office.  As she reaches the door, she looks back at 
her new boss.  JASON picks up another piece of paper on the desk and continues 
to work.  PHOEBE pauses at the door with a thoughtful smile on her face.  She 
leaves the office.)

FADE TO BLACK.

==========================
THE END
==========================

[Captioning made possible by Spelling Entertainment, Inc. Captioned by the 
National Captioning Institute www.Ncicap.Org]

Courtesy of http://www.webphilia.com/~anthology/wnp.html

Contact the Transcriptionist at (intrepidly002@yahoo.com)

Please do not archive without permission.

==========================
TITLE/OPENING CREDITS
==========================
CHARMED
5X16:  BABY'S FIRST DEMON
ORIGINAL AIR DATE ON WB:  03/30/2003
TRANSCRIBED FROM WB

Starring:
ALYSSA MILANO as Phoebe Halliwell
ROSE McGOWAN as Paige Matthews
and
HOLLY MARIE COMBS as Piper
BRIAN KRAUSE as Leo Wyatt

Created by CONSTANCE M. BURGE

Guest Starring
GRACE ZABRISKIE
REBECCA BALDING as Elise Rothman
ANDY MACKENZIE

NICHOLAS SADLER
JACK McGEE

and
ERIC DANE as Jason Dean

Consulting Producer:  JONATHAN LEVIN

Co-Producer:  MONICA BREEN
Co-Producer:  ALISON SCHAPKER
Co-Producer:  PETER CHOMSKY

Producer:  KRISTA VERNOFF
Producer:  HOLLY MARIE COMBS
Producer:  ALYSSA MILANO

Supervising Producer:  DANIEL CERONE
Co-Executive Producer:  JAMES L. CONWAY
Produced By:  JON PARE

Written by KRISTA VERNOFF
Directed by JOHN KRETCHMER

==========================
END CREDITS 
==========================

Executive Producer:  BRAD KERN
Executive Producer:  AARON SPELLING
Executive Producer:  E. DUKE VINCENT

Featured music from:
Tonic, "Head on Straight", promotional consideration furnished by Universal 
Records

Spelling Television Inc., A Paramount / Viacom Company

Story Editor:  CURTIS KHEEL
Story Editor:  HENRY ALONSO MYERS

Co-Starring
DAMIAN FOSTER as Demon Guard #2
JONATHA JOSS as Brutish Demon
DOUG BUSIN as Nerdy Demon
TAIRA SOO as Power Seller

AMANDA SICKLER as Assistant
KATE ANTHONY as Reporter Kate
TIM SITARZ as Demon Guard #1

Music by JAY GRUSKA

Casting by:  LESLEE DENNIS, C.S.A.

Original Casting by VICTORIA HUFF, C.S.A.
Director of Photography:  JONATHAN WEST, ASC
Production Designer:  PAUL STAHELI

Editors:  PAUL FONTAINE

Unit Production Manager:  JON PARE

First Assistant Director:  ROBERT MEYOYER
Second Assistant Director:  VINCENT GONZALES

Executive in Charge of Talent:  PAMELA SHAE
Costume Designer:  EILISH

Camera Operator:  KRIS KROSSKOVE
1st Assistant Camera:  RICHARD SOBIN
Chief Lighting Technician:  KURT JOHNSON
Asst. Chief Lighting Technician:  DON LEHMAN

Set Designer:  ROLAND HILL
Set Decorator:  ROBINSON ROYCE, S.D.S.A.
Leadperson:  MICHAEL ZUFELT
Property Master:  ROGER MONTESANO
Assistant Property Master:  CHRISTY McGEACHY
Script Supervisor:  NANCY SOLOMAN

Costume Supervisor:  DANIELA GSCHWENDTNER
Dept. Head Key Make-Up Artist:  NANET NEW
Key Make-Up Artist:  ANI PLOTKIN
Key Make-Up Artist:  BRET MARDOCK
Dept. Head Key Hairstylist:  AUDREY FUTTERMAN-STERN
Key Hairstylist:  LANA HEYING

Sound Mixer:  BRETT GRANT-GRIERSON
Location Manager:  BOB BOYLE
Transportation Coordinator:  DAVE BASSETT
Production Coordinator:  RICK NAPOLI
Post-Production Coordinator:  LARRY GOLDSTEIN
Production Accountant:  CHRISSY CORNWALL

First Company Grip:  STEVE GAUSCHE
2nd Company Grip:  TOM HAM
Construction Coordinator:  STAR FIELDS
Stunt Coordinator:  NOON ORSATTI
Special Effects Coordinator:  RANDY CABRAL
Visual Effects Supervisor:  STEPHEN LEBED

Executive Associate:  RENATE KAMER
Casting Associate:  MEGAN ENTRIKEN
Assistant to Brad Kern:  DOUG E. JONES
Assistant to Jon Pare:  JULIE SWARTSLEY
Assistant to the Writers:  ANDREA STEVENS

Assistant Editors:  ERIC LEA
Music Editor:  NINO CENTURION
Supervising Sound Editor:  JEFF CLARK
Music Coordinator:  CELEST RAY
Re-Recording Mixers:  JOSH SCHNEIDER / BRUCE MICHAELS / KEVIN VALENTINE

Film and Electronic Laboratory (tm) by LASERPACIFIC MEDIA
Lenses and Panaflex(R) Camera by PANAVISION(R)
Digital Sound Editing and Mixing by LASERPACIFIC MEDIA
Digital Visual Effects by ENCORE VIDEO

Executive in Charge of Production:  GAIL M. PATTERSON
Executive in Charge of Post-Production:  KENNETH MILLER

This motion picture is protected under the laws of the United States and other 
countries.  Any unauthorized duplication, copying, distribution, exhibition or 
use may result in civil liability and or criminal prosecution.

The places and characters depicted herein are entirely fictitious, and any 
similarity to any real places or people is purely coincidental.

(c) 2003 by Spelling Television Inc., A Paramount / Viacom company.  All rights 
reserved.

Country of First Publication:  United States of America

Spelling Television Inc., is the author of this film / motion picture for the 
purpose of Article 15(2) of the Berne Convention and all National Laws giving 
effect thereto.

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Dated:03/31/2003~lky
http://www.webphilia.com/~anthology/wnp.html